You turn your back in the river knowing I’m watching The light drips off your skin I don’t move I don’t breathe I just wait for you to turn ā€œturn to me / turn to meā€ It’s not the bruise I want It’s what comes after the stillness the reach the release ā€œlet go / let inā€ Sequence is crucial Touch me, then ruin me Don’t skip the part where I choose it I want to watch it happen ā€œI see it / I say yesā€ The jacket slips off my shoulder like it belongs there Oh men look too long or not at all Either way, I let them imagine what I taste like taste touch not yours Sequence is crucial Touch me, then ruin me Don’t skip the part where I choose it I want to watch it happen ā€œI see it / I say yesā€ Yeah I asked him to hit me He laughed like I was teasing But I wasn’t I just wanted to feel the *edge* of something before I crossed it ā€œcloser / still not enoughā€ It’s not the bruise I want It’s what comes after the stillness the reach the release ā€œlet go / let inā€ Sequence is crucial Touch me, then ruin me Don’t skip the part where I choose it I want to watch it happen ā€œI see it / I say yesā€ I’ve worn the desire like a second skin Let them wonder Let them ache I already know what I want ā€œwant / (yeah) want / not sorryā€ I never stop watching Even when your eyes are closed Even when mine are The loop isn’t punishment It’s pleasure to press play again to know what’s coming to want it anyway I make it happen with a look with a breath with nothing at all I ask and you listen Or you don’t It doesn’t change the ending I touch it I name it I become it slowly again… again I want Come in I'm ready come