BIOS to Windows: “Come on now! Boot up!” Windows to BIOS: “Take it easy with the young circuit boards.” Device Manager to operating system: “I've got something strange on the screen.” Response from Windows: “Ignore it for now.” Hardware Assistant to Windows: “The user is putting pressure on me. I'm supposed to identify this thing. Could be an ISDN card.” Windows: “Well, well.” Unknown ISDN card to everyone: “Would you please let me in?” Network card to intruder: “You can't spread out here!” Windows: “Quiet in the case! Otherwise I'll withdraw support from both of you!” Device Manager: “I'll offer a compromise. The network card can join in on Mondays, and the ISDN card can join in on Tuesdays.” Graphics card to Windows: “My driver retired yesterday. I'm crashing now.” Windows to graphics card: “When will you be back?” Graphics card: “Well, not right now.” CD-ROM drive to Windows: “Uh, I have a new driver here...” Windows: “What am I supposed to do with that?!” Installation software to Windows: “Leave it to me, I'll take care of it.” Windows: “That's what I like to hear.” USB port to interrupt management: “Alarm! Just penetrated by a scanner cable. Requesting response.” Interrupt management: “Where did you come from all of a sudden?” USB port: “I've been in the computer from the beginning. By the way, I have a colleague sitting next to me.” Interrupt management: “But you're not on my list.” - To Windows: “Say something.” Windows: “Hopefully another printer won't show up.” Graphics card: “The new driver is acting up.” Windows: “We'll just have to bring the old one out of retirement.” Uninstall program to new driver: “Get lost.” Unwanted driver: “You can kiss my ass.” Windows to Norton Utilities: “Kill it and its brood!” Utilities to driver remnants: “Sorry, we have to delete you.” Important system file: “Arrrrrrgghh!” Windows to blue screen: “Pass it on, the Norton boys have gone too far again.” Blue screen to user: “That's it for this week.”
