[Verse 1] He patrolled the cobbled lane With a badge and a bacon roll Pocket full of marked-up notes And a grin like stolen gold If the vicar lost his silver He said, "Aye, that's a shame" Then he winked at Mrs. Baird And took the jam from the tray [Pre-Chorus] Oh, his boots were always muddy From a midnight rendezvous He'd "inspect" the pub till closing Then inspect the till or two [Chorus] Dirty cop, dirty cop Might as well have worn a mop (dirty cop) Dirty cop, dirty cop Till the whole town yelled, "Stop!" Bagpipes cried, the fiddle laughed When they found his little stash Dirty cop, dirty cop Now he's singing for the cash [Verse 2] He framed the baker's nephew For a pie and two wee pence Then "confiscated" the evidence In a sandwich from the bench He'd park by the sweetshop corner Say it was official work But the only thing he chased that day Was a tenner in a skirt [Pre-Chorus] Oh, he swore on every saint he knew He was clean as winter snow But the hamlet kept receipts, lad And the rain told where he'd go [Chorus] Dirty cop, dirty cop Might as well have worn a mop (dirty cop) Dirty cop, dirty cop Till the whole town yelled, "Stop!" Bagpipes cried, the fiddle laughed When they found his little stash Dirty cop, dirty cop Now he's singing for the cash [Bridge] At the church hall raffle table He nicked the prize and two pork pies But the widow's purse was missing And the mayor had narrowed eyes They trailed him to the burn-side Where he hid behind a van With his boots full of loose change And a haggis in his hand [Final Chorus] Dirty cop, dirty cop Caught him red and greasy-lipped (dirty cop) Dirty cop, dirty cop With a bag of pinched-up chips Bagpipes wailed, the crowd went mad When the cuffs snapped on at last Dirty cop, dirty cop Now he's marching home at last
0/500