I’ve written a song to explain about me, and the ups and the downs of my ADHD. Were wired a bit differently, people like me, but I’ll do my best to explain….. One minute I’m playful, with the mind of a child, the next a teenager- rebellious and wild Then I’m like an old lady- just worried and tired, and living like this is a pain Sometimes I’m creative and make myself proud, I’m often ashamed when I’m told I’m too loud, But I refuse to live my life under a shroud, just to conform to society. “Too nasty”, “too nice”, “too distant”, “too much”, I care far too little, I love far too much. And an ordinary life I can never quite touch, as there’s so many versions of me. Its crazy.. damn crazy I’m not stupid, Im not lazy I wish that one day I will learn not to be – my own worst enemy Some tasks you find tough I’ll finish with ease, when I hyperfocus, I make life look a breeze, But things you find easy can make my mind freeze, and ‘brain fog’ stops me in my tracks. My memory swings between rubbish and good, I lose my belongings far more than I should- And often my thoughts feel they’re swimming in mud, or they’re shifting between white and black. I burn myself out and I’m easily stressed, and half of the time, my poor head’s in a mess. And I crash in the afternoon and need to rest, or I’m grumpy and tired and I snap. I have issues with anger, I’m aggressive with words, I lose my control and I’m rude and absurd I have a kind heart, yet my boundaries are blurred, believe me this makes me feel crap! Its crazy - damn crazy . I’m not stupid, Im not lazy But I wish that one day I will learn not to be – my own worst enemy I’ve lived most of my life with a sense of unrest, mostly disappointed and rarely impressed And I often felt like I’d got second best, and was never quite satisfied. My brain’s always busy, I never get bored, but overthinking is a double-edged sword. If it does not give a dopamine reward, then I cannot be bothered to try! So being a grown-up’s not easy for me, or any adult who has ADHD. We’re not making excuses, we just want you to see, the complexity of our world. And everyone has different battles to fight, and we all live a life in between dark and light So I hope my song has gave you an insight, to the life of this one complex girl. Its crazy -damn crazy …. I’m not stupid, Im not lazy But I wish that one day I will learn not to be – my own worst enemy
