Crikey, He’s Got Me Leg

[Verse 1] Woke up Felt tough Had a Weet-Bix brekkie Strapped on me shorts Mullet lookin' deadly Turned on the telly There he is smilin' Said "Move aside mate It’s my turn to be wildin'" Jumped in the ute Esky in the back Kmart sunnies Fake khaki on attack Posted on me gram "New wildlife king" Caption: "Watch me out-Irwin the Irwin" (oh yeah) [Chorus] Crikey He’s got me leg! Thought I’d be a legend Now I’m beggin' Greg Someone call me mum Call the ambos too This salty lizard’s chewin' on me brand-new shoe Crikey He’s got me leg! I’m not the next Steve I’m the next sausage sanga instead If I make it out I’ll just hug a koala instead [Verse 2] Found this billabong Sign said "Do not swim" I said "Rules are for cowards " did a cheeky grin Camera on record Gave a thumbs-up flex "Watch me wrestle this overgrown handbag next" (hey!) Slid down the bank Did me best TV voice "This big fella’s friendly Trust me Choice!" Then the water moved Like a sneaky log Turns out the log was a cranky Snappy dog [Chorus] Crikey He’s got me leg! Thought I’d be famous Now I’m losin' pegs Someone grab me thong It’s floatin' off downstream There goes me dignity There goes me dream Crikey He’s got me leg! I’m not the next Steve I’m the next cautionary thread If I make it out I’ll just cuddle a cattle dog instead [Bridge] [Half-time Drums drop Storyteller vibe] "Now listen up kids " I scream through the pain "Don’t copy this clown with half a brain" Be kind to the critters Respect their turf Or you’ll get dragged like me through the red dirt earth (oi!) [Chorus] Crikey He’s got me leg! Thought I’d be a hero Now I’m callin' Reg "Mate Start the ute Aim straight at the gate Tell the doc it’s urgent I’ll be bleedin' late" Crikey He’s got me leg! I’m not the next Steve I’m the next meme instead If I make it home I’ll just watch his reruns in bed (in bed) Crikey He’s got me leg!