[Intro - quiet, intimate, almost spoken, sparse distorted guitar and distant room ambience] I built a shell before I knew what it was for Just learned how to disappear when I couldn't take much more Then I found music And somehow people found me For a while I forgot how to hide [Verse 1 - gritty grunge rap, restrained drums, low distorted guitar, vulnerable male vocal] I'm not the guy who walks into a room And starts talking like I've got something to prove Usually I'm somewhere in the back Trying not to be noticed, trying not to be seen Then I started making music Started putting pieces of myself online And people started showing up And somehow I started showing up too I found a place where I could finally speak Without having to be somebody I wasn't Every song pulled another layer off Every week I felt a little less forgotten But lately I've been losing my way Staring at a screen with nothing left to say The ideas don't come like they used to And I don't know what I'm supposed to do [Pre-Chorus - melodic lift, drums building, emotional vocal] So if I disappear Please don't think I don't care Sometimes I just get tired And pull the whole world out of there [Chorus - huge melodic grunge rap chorus, anthemic but wounded, layered vocals, memorable singalong hook] I'm a turtle I go back inside When the world gets too loud I disappear for a while I'm a turtle But I'm still alive You might not see me moving But I'm still trying inside I come out, I make music I find people, I feel human Then I get scared and hide again I'm a turtle I'm a turtle [Verse 2 - heavier beat, distorted bass, more forceful rap delivery] I've made more friends through music Than I ever thought I'd make People I've never met in person Still know pieces of me I can't explain And every Friday I show up Keep the festival alive Maybe that's the only reason Somebody knows I'm still around tonight Because truth is I haven't felt like myself lately Feels like somebody took the colors And left the canvas blank I keep looking for the version of me Who couldn't wait to make something new I don't know where he went And I'm scared he took my creativity with him too And if I've hurt you by disappearing I'm sorry, I really am It isn't that you didn't matter It's that sometimes I can't even find myself [Pre-Chorus - pull back, intimate vocal, guitar ringing underneath] So if I disappear Please don't take it as goodbye I'm just underneath the shell Trying to remember how to come outside [Chorus - bigger, rawer, layered gang vocals on Turtle] I'm a turtle I go back inside When the world gets too loud I disappear for a while I'm a turtle But I'm still alive You might not see me moving But I'm still trying inside I come out, I make music I find people, I feel human Then I get scared and hide again I'm a turtle I'm a turtle [Bridge - stripped completely back, intimate spoken-sung vocal, distant guitar feedback] Maybe I haven't lost my way Maybe I'm just hiding from it Maybe I haven't lost my voice Maybe I'm just afraid to use it I've spent so much time Trying to become somebody That sometimes I forget I'm allowed to just be me And if all I can do right now Is make it through another week Then I'll make it through another week [Final Chorus - explosive grunge-rock climax, full drums, distorted guitars, layered emotional vocals] I'm a turtle I go back inside When the world gets too loud I disappear for a while I'm a turtle But I'm still alive You might not see me moving But I'm still trying inside I come out, I make music I find people, I feel human Maybe someday I won't hide again But tonight I'm a turtle Tonight I'm a turtle I'm still here I'm still here [Outro - instruments fall away, quiet vocal] If you don't see me I'm probably still here I need to reach emptiness to fill myself back up Just underneath my shell
