The Mouth

They told me hush And I did Until the hush grew teeth And started to eat me I bit my tongue ‘til it learned to taste rust Spoke in a whisper Just loud enough To prove I was tough But soft enough To be easy to trust I choked on polite Til it clogged my throat Made grief look cute Put pain in a quote Smiled on cue Like a scapegoat should Til my silence grew roots And called itself good But the mouth kept moving Even when I froze Wrote full songs In the cracks of my nose Etched verses In the backs of my teeth Screamed In the static Of my own heartbeat They said Don’t shout So I shattered Don’t cry So I bled Don’t fight So I curled into rhyme instead And now My mouth is a crime scene Stained in spit Lined in dreams Torn at the seam Where the scream got stuck Til I spit it in rhythm Like I don’t give a fuck I don’t Not anymore This is war In a four count bar This is every shut door Turned to metaphor Every clipped wing That learned to soar Every sit down Now a say more You don’t get to tame this Or name this Or frame this As poor little girl gone brave shit Nah This is sacrament This is spine This is altar built from time This is me reclaiming every line They wrote on my body Without my sign This ain’t a cry It’s a strike It’s a vow I didn’t survive Just to shut up now They called it too much I called it mine They called it a scar I called it sign They wanted me gone I stayed in time This is my mouth This is my line They said don’t cry So I carved lullabies Into my molars And baptized lies Called it grace When I shrank inside Called it strength When I let shit slide I bled for rooms That wouldn’t hold me Performed my softness So they'd fold me Into shape Into shrink Into shame Til my voice grew teeth And refused the name I broke in verse Cause they broke me first Turned silence to sermon Turned rot into thirst You call this trauma I call it church You call it pain I call it birth I rehearsed apologies For existing loud Took the blame Just to quiet the crowd But I’m done shrinking To fit your doubt My whisper’s a riot And it’s breaking out I kept the peace In a house on fire Wore I’m fine Like funeral attire Hid my truth Like it was contraband Til I couldn’t hold My own damn hands And when I said help No one came So I became The mouth of my name Stitched my shame With needle grace And dared to speak In a sacred place This isn’t art It’s archeology Digging up me From beneath apology This isn’t rhyme It’s reclamation The mouth of the ghost In full incarnation They called it too much I called it mine They called it a scar I called it sign They wanted me gone I stayed in time This is my mouth This is my line This is my mouth This is my line This is my mouth This is my line I don’t need saving I needed sound I needed ground To unbury the bound I needed me To stay when it hurt To rise from the hush To sing through the dirt This is not for them This is for us For every ghost That rose from the hush For every soul They told to die You are the mouth You are the cry Speak now Speak now You are the mouth You are the cry Speak now Speak now Speak now Speak now You survived