[Intro] [spoken Mock-heroic] Step right up Step right in Step right down Cats This ain’t pre-war pavement This is Diamond City! [trumpet flourish] The Green Jewel—polished daily by radiation and gossip [Verse 1] Piper prints papers while pressing the people Doc Crocker's cosmetic cutting curbs crinkles The Boborov's brew Boborov's Best, Moonshine that harries hirsute hair on hep chests [rapid patter] Super-sneaky synths in suspicious straw hats Hawkers haggling “Half price? Hah What’s that!?” Guard in a gas mask grumbles “Gates stay shut!” But the caps keep clinking So he shuffles his strut [Chorus] Oh The Green Jewel Jiggity-jangle and jive Where the brahmin bump but the barflies thrive “Buy Barter Better But beware that ghoul!” (what ghoul?) Everybody’s slightly sideways in the Green Green Jewel The Green Jewel Jittery Jattery Jammed If the Wasteland’s ham This here’s the ham on ham From dugout drinkers to detectives so cool We’re a gloriously Gloriously Gloriously goofy Green Jewel [Verse 2] Nick with a nick in his nickeled-out neck Talks tick-tock tales Truth tangled with tech Takahashi tuts “Nani shimasu ka?” click Serves something-sorta-soup that goes “splork splish glik” [character voices Quick] “Is that mole rat?” “It’s more rat-adjacent!” “Stop that slurp It’s a safety violation!” [curt Clipped] Gunfire Gumdrops Geiger ticks too Yet the crowd still queues for that questionable stew [Chorus] Oh The Green Jewel Jiggity-jangle and jive Where the brahmin bump but the barflies thrive “Caps Cams Chems Get your cheery fuel!” (so cool!) Everybody’s slightly sideways in the Green Green Jewel The Green Jewel Tippity-tappity town Where the mayor smiles big as he stares you down If your Pip-Boy’s pinging Here's the golden rule All bright roads rattle Right into the Green Jewel [Bridge] [low rapid patter] Diamond City radio rattling rumors Gawky-voiced Travis with deprecating humor [soft crooner imitation] “Maybe… maybe…”—oh He’s smooth as a stim While the speakers go “krk” and the power lines dim [builds faster] Caravan clatter Catcalls Clinks Cricket clicks quicker Counts caps Never blinks Little synth-sniffers shout “Smell that ghoul?” But it’s just the noodles at the Green Green Jewel [Verse 3] [accelerating patter] Fenway-fitted fortress full of funny folk fussin’ Fathers Farmers Feral-fearing families cussin’ Doctors dose day-drunk diamond-district drifters Scavvers sell “safely sourced” suspicious stitchers [spoken aside] “You sure that’s a turret?” “Sure I’m sure!" "Sir?" "It’s… decorative.” [staccato] Rust Dust Busted trust Must-adjust rules Still we cram Crammed Crinkled into this cracked-up jewel [Chorus] Oh The Green Jewel Jiggity-jangle and jive Where the brahmin bump but the barflies thrive “Step right up Stay alive That’s the daily gruel!” (hoo-hoo!) Everybody’s slightly sideways in the Green Green Jewel The Green Jewel Jittery Jattery Jammed Half of it’s crammed and the other half’s scammed But if the world’s gone wild and the sky’s gone cruel You’ll find a little Tiny Shiny Kind-of-holy [Outro] Green Jewel!
