Back in the day, I was fire on the field, Could steal a base before the glove was sealed. Still see myself like I never lost a step, But my hamstring pulled a prank I won’t forget. I’m hot, I’m cold, I’m Icy Hot, Still swingin’ for glory though I probably should not. My wife just smiles when I stagger home late, Not impressed by my strut, just my ice pack and brace. I’m hot, I’m cold, I’m Icy Hot, Dreamin’ of highlights that time forgot. The game’s long over but I ain’t forgot, Tonight I’m rubbin’ down with Icy Hot. That pop fly ball looked easy to me, But it dropped in the grass where I used to be. The crowd saw “oops,” but I swear I saw flair, Till I tripped on my pride and stayed down there. She don’t cheer my speed like she used to do, She cheers when I laugh at my slip-ups too. Thought I was smooth, thought I was cool, Turns out goofy is the new “old school.” I’m hot, I’m cold, I’m Icy Hot, Still swingin’ for glory though I probably should not. My wife just smiles when I stagger home late, Not impressed by my strut, just my ice pack and brace. I’m hot, I’m cold, I’m Icy Hot, Dreamin’ of highlights that time forgot. The game’s long over but I ain’t forgot, Tonight I’m rubbin’ down with Icy Hot. Stay frosty, stay cool — that’s what I thought… Now it’s frosty on my knees and a tube of Icy Hot.
