[Verse 1] I don't want a lot for Christmas Fuck your tacky, overpriced crap I don't care about the presents Shoved under that fake-ass tree, you sap I don't need to hang my stocking In this shithole stockroom hell Santa Claus can kiss my ass cheeks With his elves and reindeer smell I just want to bail the fuck out No more bullshit overtime spree Make my goddamn wish come true All I want for Christmas is... To torch this dump to debris, yeah! [Chorus] Oh, I don't want a lot for Christmas This is all I'm fucking asking for I just wanna see you shoppers Choking on your blood, you whores I don't need to scan your garbage Hear your whiny, entitled sneer What I want is total carnage Ram your carts up your rear Oh, baby, all I want for Christmas is... You selfish cunts to fucking die! [Verse 2] I've been trapped in this nightmare forever Every year, no escape from this grind Ringing up your worthless bullshit While you sip lattes and waste my time Now I'm losing my shit, can't you feel it? Screaming back at your dumbass commands "Discount? Eat my fist, you cheap prick!" Smash your jaw with these calloused hands I'm so lazy now, fuck the stocking Dump the coffee, let 'em slip and fall Customers whine? What a fucking pity Merry Christmas? Go choke on a ball! [Chorus] Oh, I don't want a lot for Christmas This is all I'm fucking asking for I just wanna see you shoppers Choking on your blood, you whores I don't need to scan your garbage Hear your whiny, entitled sneer What I want is total carnage Ram your carts up your rear Oh, baby, all I want for Christmas is... You selfish cunts to fucking die! [Bridge] On my break, I'm scheming in the shadows Dark plots for that holiday queen Mariah Carey, you "Christmas" bitch? I'll gut you like a festive scene Your song's endless, looping torture "All I Want"? Yeah, want your throat slit wide Rig your mic with razor wire, honey Silent night? You'll scream 'til you die! [Chorus] Oh, I don't want a lot for Christmas This is all I'm fucking asking for I just wanna see you shoppers Choking on your blood, you whores I don't need to scan your garbage Hear your whiny, entitled sneer What I want is total carnage Ram your carts up your rear Oh, baby, all I want for Christmas is... You selfish cunts to fucking die! [Outro] Oh, all the lights are blinding Like a migraine everywhere And the sound of kids' shrill laughter? Makes me wanna rip out my hair I won't miss the phony snowflakes Or the carols drilling in my brain 'Cause baby, all I want for Christmas... Is to end this soul-sucking pain!
