Might As well Feat. @djhillbilly & Juan-Six Cyded-Die)

Where haven't I been? Ah. Right. I drank my way from Dublin to Peru, Taught a dead language back when it was new. Walked the Great Wall till my boots wore through, Had a town named after me—they renamed that too. I've been to the moon and back, Left my good coat by the landing bay. Got a bootprint there, a flag, a plaque— Not that it matters anyway. I've seen everything, I've done everything, Now I might as well go to hell. If the Devil's on vacation, I can show him around myself. Oh well— Might as well go to hell. Might as well go to hell. I held a rod in a lightning storm, But God had other plans. Left me with a brand-new hairdo And a bill for eighty grand. Went hunting up inside the attic To give my brain a little snack. Found a thought I'd locked away— Little bastard smacked me back. Tried to fly without a bungee cord; Gravity quit of its own accord. Left me floating, fit and well— Might as well go to hell. I've seen everything, I've done everything, Now I might as well go to hell. If the Devil's takin' demons, He can hire my ass, himself. Oh well— Might as well go to hell. Might as well go to hell. Stood beside a meteorite; It killed the whole world overnight. Brushed a continent off my sleeve— Even the cockroaches got to leave. Took myself for a tan on the sun. It said, "Nope," before I'd even begun. Pulled a face like it sucked a lemon— That's swell. Might as well go to hell. There's a box marked "Date of death" On the booking form they sent. Wrote, "To be confirmed," And asked how much they charge for rent. Packed some coins from fallen kingdoms And a change of underwear. If the Reaper won't come get me, He can meet me at the stairs. I've seen everything, I've done everything, Now I might as well go to hell. If the Devil's short on staff, He can show me round himself. If Heaven won't have me either, I'll leave them a bad review-Oh well— Might as well Might as well go to hell. Might as well, Might as well go to hell Might as well go to hell