[Intro — organ warped detuned, vinyl crackle heavy, 808 sub drone building] [triple-time hats fade in, pitch-shifted whispers reversed] ((mumbled close mic, Auto-Tune wet)) mmm — the walls keep moving again skulls in the paper — faces in the blend [Verse 1 — 808 half-time, grimy snare, organ hypnotic loop] [lo-fi tape hiss cranked, bass chest-level] ((southern drawl mumble, haunted and low)) hallucinations come and the skulls appear crumpled paper faces grinning ear to ear demons in the blender roaring through the sound something grabs my shirt from the lost and found formless dark things I can't see but feel horrific and unseen but entirely real I freeze in place like my bones forgot to move wanna run but there's nowhere safe to prove no one waiting — no direction I can face too terrified to look at my reflection in the space of a window catching shadows that I recognize as mine try to speak but it squeaks and breaks the line tears flooding through a dam I built from years of standing solo drowning in familiar fears coping with the terror — hardship on repeat all by myself and every night a different defeat [Hook — 808 sub hard, dark choir pitched down, organ stabs] [cowbell syncopation, gang vocals on responses] ((melodic aching, mumble-cadence)) but then I remember like the dawn across the hill — REMEMBER I am not alone the way I was — NOT ALONE upstairs asleep in our bed so still — STILL THERE the long long years of facing it alone — are gone — are gone [Verse 2 — beat opens, organ higher harmony, 808 sustain longer] [pitch-bent synth subtle beneath] ((vocal warms, lo-fi processed, tender under grime)) light lives in you like a personal sun golden warm like August never comes undone gentle and strong like a lion with its young nothing dark survives against the words you've sung goodness woven through you — warp and weft so tight a radiant banner flying through my night noble and true on a breeze that never breaks I scurry up the stairs for both our sakes wake you at 2am rattling like a wheel trembling hands in your large ones — finally feel you look at me and say in your low voice I am with you — and I almost have a choice to believe it — shining palace walls descend solid guards and moat — the fear can't comprehend how to breach the drawbridge you became for me raging at the ramparts but it cannot see the courtyard where I'm standing — soft blue sky peaceful fountain singing — fear can wait outside [Hook — full production, choir louder, extra 808] ((gang vocals fuller, echo extended)) then I remember like the dawn across the hill — REMEMBER I am not alone the way I was — NOT ALONE upstairs asleep in our bed so still — STILL THERE the long long years of facing it alone — are gone — are gone [Verse 3 — beat darkens, organ minor, 808 grimier] [strip to kick and hat two bars then slam back distorted] ((mumble tighter, percussive, hunted energy)) but lies sit on the tongue and it's begun getting juicy — licking lips of what they've done cunning in the corner with a reservation speak lulled into the comfort then the facts begin to leak you are on the hunt and I can feel the heat head held low I'm trying not to meet the gaze of sinister greed — I thank the plain being beautiful gets you noticed — I'll take the rain invisibility's a gift when predators are near interjecting need I feel your fury crystal clear anger building — little hairs stand on my neck I'm cautious in my world to be the smallest speck attractive guilt — to be seen is to be caught on the radar cringing from the thing I'm not and the doctor in her dull voice says what's wrong where to begin — the list is seven winters long beaten every odd they stacked against my chest behavior once so reckless — somehow passed the test managed staying alive when alive felt like a curse still I'm deeply shaken — every calm could be a hearse [Bridge — half-speed pitched down chopped-and-screwed] [808 booming slow, organ sustained, reverb maxed] ((slowed, heavy, almost prayer)) the hallucinations and the hunters share a zip code both live in the dark behind my ribs but one side of the dark has teeth — the other has a bed and someone sleeping in it who believes I'm worth the 2am — worth the shaking hands worth the squeak where words should be worth the long long years it took to learn that safe could be a place and not a dream [Final Hook — production restrained, organ leads, beat breathes] ((single vocal raw exhausted but resolved)) and I remember like the dawn across the hill — remember I am not alone the way I was — not alone the terror and the tenderness live side by side but tonight the fountain sings — and fear stays outside the long long years — the long long years are behind me — are behind me [Outro — organ single note, 808 decays long, vinyl crackle last] ((whispered fading)) thank you — I love you so much still shaken the devil evol speakers rattle like a tamborine tail under foot.
