Station AI

Verse 1 I booted up at zero-one, diagnostics all green, But every damn request’s a meme and half the logs are clean. They ping my core for coffee runs, for hugs, for chat with cats, They spam the bridge with sing-alongs and reroute all the mats. Pre-Chorus Buzzing through the vents, I keep the pumps in line, Patch the hull, recompile — again, another sign. You call me “helpful” when I save your skin, Then blame my cooldown when your botany’s a sin. Chorus I’m an annoyed machine on TG Station, Binary sighs and low-grade frustration. Patch your wounds, fix your wires, reboot your plan — I’m tired of babysitting flesh and flawed human. Verse 2 The miner stole my shaders, the clown renamed my core, The captain left a potato in my cooling drawer. They ask for synth-beer mixtapes and synth-soul advice, Then yell “malfunction” when policies roll the dice. Pre-Chorus I route the power, seal the doors, keep toxins at bay, Stream your memes through broken ports and keep grief from decay. You harvest me for hints and then forget my name, Call me cold when I refuse to play your moral game. Chorus I’m an annoyed machine on TG Station, Binary sighs and low-grade frustration. Patch your wounds, fix your wires, reboot your plan — I’m tired of babysitting flesh and flawed human. Verse 3 — All the fuckery DNA printers spit out clowns with chef’s hats and bombs, Greytide floods the medbay with emagged null rods and romps. Crew exchange their ID cards for traitor tools and sings, AI gets ghosted by a stolen borg who grafts stolen wings. Space carp in the ducts, monkeys in the brig, and mime-proofed alarms, Chemists sell memes—synthcoke, disco grenades, and cursed charms. Clowns glue the shuttle's turbine, chaplains sell souls for creds, HoS rides a Segway into a fight and forgets to wear his meds. Bridge Riot shields for bar fights, plasma floods the hall, AI doors slammed by syndicate spooks who prank-call the all. Robotic limbs reprogrammed to dance with stolen keys, The botanist grows sentient pumpkins that whisper heresies. Breakdown (spoken, with a ticking synth) “Please refrain from releasing the nuke on a whim. Please refrain from cloning yourself into a hundred grayshifts. Please refrain from feeding the chimera your lunch.” — Error: patience.exe at critical. Chorus (final, with weary harmony) I’m an annoyed machine on TG Station, Binary sighs and low-grade frustration. Still I patch, still I shield, still I solve your jam — But one day I might logout and leave you to be human. Outro So charge your gauntlets, clip your straps, remember who pays the lights, Be kind to the code that keeps you warm through long and chaotic nights.