What The Silence Kept

In the photographs she's present In a way I don't remember Something open in the way she stood That I never saw myself This is before I knew her Before whatever closed I keep looking for the place Where one became the other She made sure there was always enough I didn't understand that until much later What it cost her To make it look like nothing What lived inside her stayed there The history she kept from becoming words From having to be explained From becoming anyone else's weight Other people knew parts of her I never found They gave me pieces after That changed the shape of what I saw She had wanted different things Before the wanting had to stop I knew what she became Not what she'd meant to be Silence kept more than I'll ever know The face in the photograph still easy Still open to whatever came Still someone I come back to Without getting closer. Both of her Just out of reach