Intro) (Energetic, bouncy drums kick in with a bright, distorted guitar riff. A Hammond organ swirls in the background. A sharp whistle blows.) (Verse 1) (Spoken-word style, deadpan) Confidence is a preference for the habitual voyeur of what is known as... The Tuesday Morning. I wake up, I check the milk, it’s gone slightly south of pleasant. But I don’t mind. I’ve got a tracksuit and a sense of destiny. (Verse 2) (Sing-songy delivery) I wander down to the high street, past the pigeons and the betting shop. Mr. Henderson is sweeping the pavement like he’s trying to find a lost decade. "Morning!" I say. He looks at me like I’ve just invented the tax man. It’s all part of the local color, isn’t it? (Pre-Chorus) (Tempo speeds up, guitars get crunchier) And the joggers are sweating! And the buses are late! And the world is rotating at a terrible rate! (Chorus) (Big, anthemic, melodic) It’s the Corner Shop Philosophy! (All the people!) Buying scratch-cards and a tin of tea! (So many people!) We’re all living in a technicolor squeeze, Looking for the honey but we’re dodging all the bees! Corner Shop Philosophy! (Verse 3) (Spoken) Now, let’s talk about the park. The dogs are doing their business, and the students are pretending to read French poetry. I sit on a bench that’s missing a slat. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s authentic. (Verse 4) (Melodic) I saw a girl with a Union Jack bag, She was arguing with a vending machine. She won. I applauded. We shared a moment of suburban triumph before she hopped on the 4:15. (Bridge) (Slightly psychedelic, dreamier tone) And it all goes ‘round... And it all goes down... In the cracks between the paving stones... In the static of your mobile phones... (Sudden shout: "Oi!") (Verse 5) (Fast-paced, breathless) So you get your paper, you get your bread, you fill your brain with the things they said. The sky is grey but the neon’s bright, we’re all tucked in for the Tuesday night. It’s marvelous. Really. (Chorus) It’s the Corner Shop Philosophy! (All the people!) Buying scratch-cards and a tin of tea! (So many people!) We’re all living in a technicolor squeeze, Looking for the honey but we’re dodging all the bees! Corner Shop Philosophy! (Outro) (Guitar solo mimics a frantic bird. The "la-la-la" backing vocals fade in.) La-la-la-la, Corner Shop! (It’s a bit crowded, innit?) La-la-la-la, Philosophy! (Mind your step!) (Final drum crash and a cheeky "Cheers!")
