[intro] [Verse 1] There is a daily fight at the toilet rack It's turned forward, and others hang it back, Some crumple, Some fold to clean, But the best is the one-wipe queen [Chorus:] Why make war? Where is it good for? Constantly turning, the toilet paper roll. From the bathroom to the store, During lockdown even more, We're fighting in the great eternal toilet paper war. [Verse 2] Back in 1891 they filed a smart design, The patent shows the paper should hang forward all the time. So the inventor cast their vote, but still we disagree, A century later and we’re still not free! [Chorus:] Why make war? Where is it good for? Constantly turning, the toilet paper roll. From the bathroom to the store, During lockdown even more, We're fighting in the great eternal toilet paper war. [Bridge] The folders vs. the crumplers, the one-wipers too, And don’t forget the fridge-roll crew! During lockdown, shelves were the first to hit. We fought as if our lives depends on it. [Breakdown] Hamster it! — stack it high! Hide a roll before supply. Crumple, fold, or stash away, We’ll fight till our dying day. [Final Chorus] Why make war? Where is it good for? Constantly turning, the toilet paper roll. From the bathroom to the store, During lockdown even more, We got to stop this toilet paper war.
