[Verse 1] Clover in the empty yard Low green mouth after rain It does not call itself lucky It does not ask for a name It only learns the open places The soft rot, the loosened seam It only takes what was abandoned And makes a body of the green I was not trying to become bitter I was not trying to become cruel But something in me kept reaching For the shape that left the room Now every root has your shadow Every leaf has your face And I hate that I miss you In the thing that took your place [Pre-Chorus] I don’t want to hate you But the field keeps turning wild I don’t want to want you Like a wound wants to be touched I am holding back the weather With my teeth and both my hands But the rain knows where you left me And the clover understands [Chorus] Fuck your silver lining I don’t want the rain explained I am not your lucky ending I’m what grew after the pain Fuck your silver lining No lesson in the green I miss you like a root system Choking everything beneath [Verse 2] Three leaves for the almost One for what survived Everybody wants the miracle Nobody wants the vine Clover is not gentle Just because it looks that way It can kiss the whole lawn softly While it steals the light away And I am trying to be kinder Than the grief that learned your name Trying not to make a monster Out of missing you this way But I loved you in the weather I loved you in the mud I loved you past the ending And it still was not enough [Pre-Chorus] I don’t want to hate you But the field keeps turning wild I don’t want to want you Like a wound wants to be touched I am holding back the weather With my teeth and both my hands But the rain knows where you left me And the clover understands [Chorus] Fuck your silver lining I don’t want the rain explained I am not your lucky ending I’m what grew after the pain Fuck your silver lining No lesson in the green I miss you like a root system Choking everything beneath [Bridge] Where does love go When it has no door? When the hand it wants Is not reaching anymore? Where does anger sleep When it still has your eyes? When the mouth says go And the body says lie, lie, lie? I don’t want to curse you I don’t want to kneel I don’t want forgiveness If it makes this less real I want to be empty I want to be clean But I am full of wet soil And all this disobedient green So do not call it healing When the garden disappears Do not call it closure Just because I’m still here [Final Chorus] Fuck your silver lining I don’t want the rain explained I am not your lucky ending I’m what grew after the pain Fuck your silver lining No lesson in the green I miss you like a root system Choking everything beneath Fuck your silver lining Do not dress this up as grace I am angry and I love you And I hate that both have stayed [Outro] Clover in the empty yard Low green mouth after rain I don’t want to hate you But I grew around your name
