[Verse 1] Well, Joe thought he’d be a real tough guy, Bought a ten-gallon hat and a squint in his eye, Rode into town with a look so mean, But his horse got spooked and he fell in the stream. [Chorus] Oh, Joe the inept outlaw, Can’t shoot straight, can’t even draw, Trips on his boots, falls in the dirt, He’s a wanted man, but he can't find his shirt. [Verse 2] Tried robbing the bank with a plan so slick, But he forgot his mask and his gun was a stick, He yelled “Hands up!” but nobody flinched, The teller just laughed and said, “You got pinched!” [Chorus] Oh, Joe the inept outlaw, Can’t shoot straight, can’t even draw, Misses the train, gets locked in jail, He’s the worst bad man to ever hit the trail. [Bridge] He’s got a bounty on his head, but the sheriff don’t care, He says, “Joe ain’t worth the paperwork or the fare,” His horse runs faster than he ever could, But he can’t saddle up, he’s just that no good. [Verse 3] Last seen running from his own shadow, Lost in the desert with his sad little burro, He tried to be a legend, a real outlaw king, But he’s just a punchline for the folks to sing. [Chorus Refrain] Oh, Joe the inept outlaw, Can’t shoot straight, can’t even draw, Rides off into the sunset wrong way ‘round, The only outlaw who can’t leave town.
