[Verse 1] You found a rumor by the coffee machine Half a sentence and a peppermint sheen Janet says the printer has a secret plan The copier coughs like an old jazz man [Pre-Chorus] Someone brought a cake with no birthday name Someone changed the Wi-Fi and forgot the game I checked the clock, it blinked back at me Nine-oh-seven feels like century three [Chorus] It’s only Monday, why’s the week so wide? Water cooler talk with nowhere left to hide Pass the paper cup, tell me what you heard By Friday afternoon we’ll know every word It’s only Monday, keep the gossip light We’ve got four more days to get it almost right [Verse 2] The break-room fern got moved an inch east Now everybody’s calling it a workplace beast Mark saw Linda laughing near the loading bay By lunchtime they’d announced a cabaret [Pre-Chorus] The meeting moved from two to half-past ten Then moved again, then moved again I made a list of things I’d like to do The list got forwarded to the whole crew [Chorus] It’s only Monday, why’s the week so wide? Water cooler talk with nowhere left to hide Pass the paper cup, tell me what you heard By Friday afternoon we’ll know every word It’s only Monday, keep the gossip light We’ve got four more days to get it almost right [Bridge] At the cooler, everybody leans in close The biggest news is who brought extra toast No one knows what’s true, but everyone agrees The break room has a thriving bureaucracy [Final Chorus] It’s only Monday, but we’re fully booked With tiny revelations and a sideways look Pass the paper cup, tell me what you heard By Friday afternoon we’ll know every word It’s only Monday, let the rumors roll A little office nonsense keeps the gears in soul [Outro] Only Monday Still got Tuesday Only Monday Who moved the stapler anyway?
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