[Verse 1] Phone rings, I answer, "Hello, IT," A voice on the line says, "It’s not working for me." I ask for details, just a little clue, But they’re already sure it’s something I didn’t do. [Pre-Chorus] (It’s the printer, or maybe the screen?) "It’s just broken, you know what I mean?" No, I don’t, but I give a polite nod, To the invisible face of this tech demigod. [Chorus] They say, "The mouse won’t scroll, the Wi-Fi is dead, And the website keeps showing this thing that you said." I said no such thing, but they’re sure I’m the cause, And I’m here taking blame with a round of applause. [Verse 2] "Have you tried restarting?" I ask with care, But they scoff like I’ve just grown a third ear there. "I’ve been using computers since '92, Don’t treat me like I’ve got no clue!" [Pre-Chorus] (But then they say the monitor’s black…) "And there’s this weird clicking when I hit the back!" I think to myself, "Oh boy, here we go," Another day in the IT show. [Chorus] They say, "The app’s on the fritz, my emails won’t send, And don’t get me started on the office trend." It’s all my fault, the mistakes they defend, While I Google their problem and just pretend. [Bridge] (Guitar slows, spoken:) "So you’ve unplugged it? Oh, you’re sure it’s plugged in." "Wait, what’s this cable? Oh, that’s where it’s been!" "And the Wi-Fi... oh, you mean Bluetooth, right?" (Melodic again:) I’ll fix it for you, just hold tight. [Chorus] They’re shouting about pop-ups, the cursor’s too fast, And blaming me for the system they crashed. I nod along, this call will not last, As they lecture on tech like it’s a broadcast. [Outro] The line goes dead, I breathe out a sigh, Another battle won, but I don’t know why. I fix their messes, no thank-you in sight, And tomorrow, I’ll be back for another fight. (Spoken over final chord:) "Wait, what’s a password?" ...Oh boy. (Dramatic strum to end.)
