[INTRO — SPOKEN] Ladies and gentlemen... Please remain calm. Martin Pussy has entered the building. [VERSE 1] I walked down Carnaby Street, In trousers ten feet wide, A purple shirt beneath my coat, And confidence beside. The ladies stop and stare at me, Or so I like to think, I give them my most charming smile, They nearly lose their drink. [PRE-CHORUS] I've got the glasses, I've got the hair, I've got a moustache beyond compare. I've got the shoes, I've got the style, I've been sophisticated For quite a while. [CHORUS] I'm a very modern man, Yes, I am, yes, I am! Everybody knows my name, Martin Pussy is the game! Shake it, baby, shake it, Let the London lights go wild, I'm sophisticated, And remarkably versatile! [VERSE 2] My tailor says I'm dangerous, My dentist says I'm brave, My mother says I'm handsome, Though she's slightly biased, love. I've got a motorcar in red, A telephone of gold, And seven different dinner suits For parties rather cold. [BRASS HIT] [PRE-CHORUS] I've got the swagger, I've got the grin, I've got a way of walking That should be a sin. I've got the cologne, I've got the charm, And absolutely no idea What could possibly go wrong! [CHORUS] I'm a very modern man, Yes, I am, yes, I am! Everybody knows my name, Martin Pussy is the game! Shake it, baby, shake it, Let the London lights go wild, I'm sophisticated, And remarkably versatile! [SAMBA BREAK — SPOKEN] Oh, darling... Tambourines at the ready! [BRASS + SAMBA PERCUSSION] [VERSE 3] I dine at half past midnight, I breakfast at three, I never pay the taxi man, He usually pays me. I know the finest restaurants, The clubs and cabarets, And if they won't admit me, I simply charm my way. [CALL & RESPONSE] MARTIN: Who's the smartest man in town? BACKING VOCALS: Martin Pussy! MARTIN: Who's the smoothest man around? BACKING VOCALS: Martin Pussy! MARTIN: Who's the man with perfect taste? BACKING VOCALS: Martin Pussy! MARTIN: Who wears trousers far too wide? BACKING VOCALS: MARTIN PUSSY! [PSYCHEDELIC BREAK] MARTIN: Oh yes... London is looking absolutely marvellous tonight. [BRIDGE] Maybe I'm ridiculous, Maybe I'm absurd, But if you look this fabulous, You don't need another word. So pour another champagne, Turn the record up, Give me that Brazilian rhythm, And fill my little cup! [FINAL CHORUS] I'm a very modern man, Yes, I am, yes, I am! Everybody knows my name, Martin Pussy is the game! I'm a very modern man, The most sophisticated in the land! If elegance is what you seek, You'll find it dancing on my feet! [OUTRO — SPOKEN] Martin Pussy... International gentleman. London. Paris. Rio. And occasionally Croydon. [BRASS STING]
