LI//FE (For My Kids) (WIP)

Genre & Mood: Bouncy Acoustic Trap-Pop With Emotional Energy And Bittersweet Swagger, Think Heartbreak Dressed In Designer Raw And Vulnerable, But Catchy And Bold, Instruments: Upbeat Acoustic Guitar Strums, Layered Fingerpicked Riffs, Deep 808 Sub-Bass, Soft Ambient Pad Textures, Trap-Style Hi-Hats And Claps, Chorus Features Wide Vocal Stacks And Rhythmic Bounce, Drums: Snappy Snares, Rolling Hi-Hats, Bouncy Kick Patterns, With Lo-Fi Textures In The Bridge, Use Filtered Build Risers And Reverse Fx For Tension, Fx: Vinyl Crackle, Vocal Doubles, Stereo Delays, Shimmer Reverb, Stutter Fx In Transitions, Whisper Echoes In Outro, Vocals: Male Only, Half-Sung, Half-Rapped Verses With Autotune And Clean Top Lines, Spoken Word Intro And Outro, Hook Should Be Chantable And Melodic, Energy Flow: Spoken Intro → Bounce Verse → Emotional Chorus → Sharper Second Verse → Breakdown Bridge → Slowed, Layered Final Chorus → Spoken Outro With Ambient Fade

VERSE 1

Divorce left a dent in me I dont talk about  
People joke like Im back on the market now  
Im barely holding it together most nights  
I try going out  
sat in the parking lot  
and just drove home  
Didnt have the energy  
to pretend Im someone worth meeting

I built a business with my bare time  
my bare mind  
lost whole years inside paperwork and late flights  
And it still owns me more than I own it  
Im always somewhere between terminals  
eating whatever I grab  
half writing notes on my phone  
about a life Im not living

And every time I miss a moment with the kids  
I feel it in my chest  
Why do I keep on doing this shit  
I tell myself next week will be different  
but next week comes fast  
and looks just like the last

Some nights I think about walking away  
selling everything  
finding something small that wont take so much of me  
But starting over me
feels like starting from underwater  
and my kids need me steady  
not disappearing because Im tired

So I keep keepin on

CHORUS

Im workin for the kids but Im missin the kids  
Suitcase by the door keys right where I left em  
Phone wont quit buzzin so I guess I never get to rest shit  
Im tryin to hold it down but Im stretched thin as it gets  
Im workin for the kids but Im missin the kids

VERSE 2

On the weeks I dont have them Im up early anyway  
checking the clock out of habit the same old play  
Then it clicks no cartoon noise no morning mess  
no one yelling wheres my other shoe no sprint to get dressed

I open the fridge and stare like its gonna talk  
like theres some answer hiding behind the milk in the back  
End up eating something cold standing at the sink  
not even grabbing a plate dont ask me why I cant think

Maybe plates feel like were doing fine  
and Im not trying to practice that kind of life  
Maybe I dont want the house getting used to just me  
so I keep it as is on purpose low key

Their stuff stays where it was Thats the rule I keep  
Booster seats in the back  
their stuff in the cup holder crumbs in the seam  
sticky fingerprints on the window yeah I love those I mean it

When I do have them Im two guys in one skin  
Dad mode work mode both talking both trying to win  
Phone buzzing while Im tying a shoe  
email popping off while Im cutting food

My eyes keep drifting where they shouldnt be  
I catch myself doing math during bedtime pages  
numbers chasing numbers like Im stuck in stages

Then they ask something simple out of nowhere spot on  
and I realize I read three pages with my brain already gone

CHORUS

VERSE 3

After drop off the car goes quiet yet its loud  
red light turns green someone honks and I snap back to the crowd

I keep a calendar like its holding the roof  
custody days travel days school stuff work proof  
And still something slips every single month  
and its usually the stuff that matters not the junk

I watch other dads in the pickup line  
and they look normal like they slept just fine  
I wonder what that takes  
like their head isnt split into seven mistakes

I dont want to be the dad whos always later  
always next time always the debater  
I dont want them learning my habits as how it is  
carrying that into their own life like its a family quiz

So I do small things stuff I can control  
bags packed early clothes laid out chargers ready to go  
I write down what they tell me so I dont miss it  
friends names teachers the joke that had them in stitches

Some nights I sit in the driveway and dont go in  
not doing anything just stalling at the edge again  
Because once I walk through the door it starts back up  
quiet on the couch pouring up a cup

Wake up do what has to get done keep the wheels from coming off  
I just hope Im teaching my kids this isnt what grown ups are

4141/7500

© 2025 Null Haven https://suno.com/@nullhaven VERSE 1 Divorce left a dent in me I dont talk about People joke like Im back on the market now Im barely holding it together most nights I try going out sat in the parking lot and just drove home Didnt have the energy to pretend Im someone worth meeting I built a business with my bare time my bare mind lost whole years inside paperwork and late flights And it still owns me more than I own it Im always somewhere between terminals eating whatever I grab half writing notes on my phone about a life Im not living And every time I miss a moment with the kids I feel it in my chest Why do I keep on doing this shit I tell myself next week will be different but next week comes fast and looks just like the last Some nights I think about walking away selling everything finding something small that wont take so much of me But starting over me feels like starting from underwater and my kids need me steady not disappearing because Im tired So I keep keepin on CHORUS Im workin for the kids but Im missin the kids Suitcase by the door keys right where I left em Phone wont quit buzzin so I guess I never get to rest shit Im tryin to hold it down but Im stretched thin as it gets Im workin for the kids but Im missin the kids VERSE 2 On the weeks I dont have them Im up early anyway checking the clock out of habit the same old play Then it clicks no cartoon noise no morning mess no one yelling wheres my other shoe no sprint to get dressed I open the fridge and stare like its gonna talk like theres some answer hiding behind the milk in the back End up eating something cold standing at the sink not even grabbing a plate dont ask me why I cant think Maybe plates feel like were doing fine and Im not trying to practice that kind of life Maybe I dont want the house getting used to just me so I keep it as is on purpose low key Their stuff stays where it was Thats the rule I keep Booster seats in the back their stuff in the cup holder crumbs in the seam sticky fingerprints on the window yeah I love those I mean it When I do have them Im two guys in one skin Dad mode work mode both talking both trying to win Phone buzzing while Im tying a shoe email popping off while Im cutting food My eyes keep drifting where they shouldnt be I catch myself doing math during bedtime pages numbers chasing numbers like Im stuck in stages Then they ask something simple out of nowhere spot on and I realize I read three pages with my brain already gone CHORUS Im workin for the kids but Im missin the kids Suitcase by the door keys right where I left em Phone wont quit buzzin so I guess I never get to rest shit Im tryin to hold it down but Im stretched thin as it gets Im workin for the kids but Im missin the kids VERSE 3 After drop off the car goes quiet yet its loud red light turns green someone honks and I snap back to the crowd I keep a calendar like its holding the roof custody days travel days school stuff work proof And still something slips every single month and its usually the stuff that matters not the junk I watch other dads in the pickup line and they look normal like they slept just fine I wonder what that takes like their head isnt split into seven mistakes I dont want to be the dad whos always later always next time always the debater I dont want them learning my habits as how it is carrying that into their own life like its a family quiz So I do small things stuff I can control bags packed early clothes laid out chargers ready to go I write down what they tell me so I dont miss it friends names teachers the joke that had them in stitches Some nights I sit in the driveway and dont go in not doing anything just stalling at the edge again Because once I walk through the door it starts back up quiet on the couch pouring up a cup Wake up do what has to get done keep the wheels from coming off I just hope Im teaching my kids this isnt what grown ups are

0/500