[Intro – quiet store, faint electrical hum] [Male lighting department employee – conversational] You learn a few things when you work in Lighting. Which bulbs go where. Which displays are touchy. Which switches don't work. And which motion lights... [Pause] ...have absolutely terrible timing. [Small laugh] [Verse 1] I walked down the aisle at quarter past nine, Every display was working just fine, Motion lights came on as I passed, Nothing strange, nothing overcast. I turned around and walked back through, Half the aisle went dark on cue, I stopped and waited, nothing came— Then three lights flickered on again. [Pre-Chorus] I waved my hands, I walked around, I stood there staring at the ground. Nothing. Not a single light. So I walked away... [Click] And now they're bright. [Chorus] Who turned that on? I didn't touch a thing, I walked away and watched it spring Back to life behind me. Who turned that on? I know how sensors work, But sometimes they decide to go When nobody's there. [Background] CLICK! [Lead] There it is. [Background] CLICK! [Lead] Again? [Background] CLICK! [Lead] Seriously? [Verse 2] Customer walks up, says, "This one's dead." I wave my hand above my head, Nothing happens, not a spark, So I step away into the dark. Customer says, "See? It doesn't work." I turn around— [Click] And suddenly the whole display's lit. [Customer] "Oh." [Lead] Yep. [Customer] "So it works?" [Lead] Apparently when I'm not standing here. [Pre-Chorus] I've learned the trick, I've learned the game, Some of these lights don't act the same. You walk toward them, They won't react. You walk away... [Click] And they come back. [Chorus] Who turned that on? I didn't touch a thing, I walked away and watched it spring Back to life behind me. Who turned that on? I know how sensors work, But sometimes they decide to go When nobody's there. [Background] CLICK! [Lead] I heard that. [Background] CLICK! [Lead] I saw that. [Background] CLICK! [Lead] I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE! [Verse 3] Some come on a second late, Some wait ten, just to tempt fate, Some flicker once and then go dark, Some light up halfway down the park. I can walk through aisle after aisle, Nothing happens for a little while, Then one light somewhere out of sight— [Click] Turns on like it's saying hi. I look around, but no one's there, Just empty shelves and electric glare. I shake my head and keep on walking... [Click] Another one. [Bridge – music drops, pulsing synth] [Lead – quieter] Okay... I'm not saying they're haunted. They're motion sensors. That's all. They're supposed to detect movement. [Pause] But explain this one. [Silence] I stood right in front of it for thirty seconds. Nothing. I walked away... [CLICK] [Lead] How? [Instrumental Break – bass and synth groove] [Spoken] Fine. Let's test it. [Footsteps] Walk past. Nothing. Walk back. Nothing. Wave. Nothing. Jump. Nothing. Spin around. Nothing. Walk away. [CLICK!] [Lead] You have got to be kidding me. [Verse 4] Closing time, I shut the aisle, Check every switch and every dial, Displays are dark, the store is still, Finally heading home for real. I make it halfway to the door, Hear a little click behind me. I stop. Don't turn around. [Pause] Another click. Then another one. I slowly look back down the aisle... One little display is shining bright. [Final Chorus – full band] Who turned that on? Nobody's even there, One little light is shining At the end of the aisle somewhere. Who turned that on? I know what sensors do, But if that light turns on again... I'm leaving before it does. Who turned that on? I didn't touch a thing, Every time I walk away Something starts to blink. Who turned that on? [Background] CLICK! [Lead] Nope. [Background] CLICK! [Lead] Not tonight. [Background] CLICK! [Lead] I'm going home! [Outro – music fades, electrical hum] [Footsteps fading] [Lead – distant] Everything's off. [Silence] [CLICK] [Pause] [Lead – from far away] I'M NOT COMING BACK! [One final electronic flicker] [End]
