Trapper Keeper Dreams

Yeah, yeah, yeah I’ma say what it is when the roof leak I’ma say what it is when the room reeks Yeah Yeah, yeah, one, two Might not like the mirror when it talks back My fridge got ketchup and a cough pack My life ain’t fancy, just all caps Like typing on a forum where the trolls at I don’t watch Mall rats when I’m zoned in Ate a whole pizza while watching reruns of matches with Hulk Hogan Used to get ghosted in the cold wind Now I leave folks on read like a bold sin Neck beard, scarf in the summertime Eat beans out the can while I hum a line Some tracks only hit when you’re deep fried Fuck the playoffs, fuck the free ride Sick of every post with a moral story, bro She asked what’s wrong? I said Maury show I was up last night eatin’ corn slow Contemplatin’ if SpongeBob’s poor or broke Cut ties like coupons with no scan ‘Cause even big dreams fit a broke van If your verse too tight, make a slow jam I had a nightmare I worked at JoAnn’s Woke up, hand on the sink, bro She asked what’s up? I said “Bingo” Then I felt all weird from the soft light Looked outside, sky still lookin’ like Fortnite Half combed fade, hoodie with a weak zip Snack crumbs posted on my cheek tip Some songs just hit when the lights dim Fuck the bracket, fuck the hype gym And I been walkin’ ‘round like the Wi-Fi broke Steppin’ on rose petals with a quiet hope I collect weird dreams in a Trapper Keeper Still mad they nerfed Zelda in Smash Melee, Why my head play shows with no laugh track? Why my phone autocorrect to “hash tax”? And rappers act profound like a bad fax But couldn’t write a bar with a hazmat Yeah, I double jump kicked in Tekken 3 Then I rage quit life on a memory leak Mispronounced “aura” as “okra” once (Don’t let ‘em see you eat all the crumbs) Censorship’s trash I’m the type to wear a cape with no flash She got them Netflix logins stashed I won’t pay ‘til I know it’ll last (okay) What’s the largest Slurpee I can smuggle? One hand in Prague, one in this puddle If not, I’ma bounce with a light chuckle Exit through the fridge like a ninja turtle Sorry Wanda Lost the signal Saw your message Flipped the Kindle Hide all your fries behind the pillow Bye-bye diet, I’m back with Skittles (yeah) And I don’t trust shows with too much plot If it don’t have a dragon or a dumb bot Still salty they killed Glenn on the spot Watched it twice, then yelled at a crockpot Yeah, my girl said “breathe” while I eat a lot I said “I’m fine” with a mouthful of Cheez Puffs She said “that’s not love,” I said “probably” Then put on King of the Hill like it’s prophecy Ain’t slept right since the fifth grade Woke up dreamin’ I was Rick-James Bogartin’ snacks on a rented boat Yellin’ “Give It To Me” with a bent throat Brotha told me, “we’re all just broke, man” He once built a bong outta Coke cans Life gets weird when you blink slow One minute chess, next minute Plinko I’m like “Hey bro, is this gluten free?” He said “Naw, that’s just chicken feet” Cool cool, I’ma dip like Coolio Half eaten fries and chicken bones at the studio Still wear Crocs to the job fair Tell ‘em I design air, with a blank stare And I walk like I’m late but I show up early Hair like Kramer, mood like Shirley Temple or Jackson, depends on the day Sometimes both with the satellite delay Sick of ramen, but I’ll never complain Microwaved twice in the House Of Pain Laptop smokin’ like Doc Brown’s van Still using Paint like a grown ass man Had a thought, wrote it down, then I lost it Traced it back to a cat with a faucet He was sippin’ and dreamin’ of lunch meat I saluted, then tripped on the front seat No closure Just more folders She said “grow up,” I said “nah that’ll just make me older” Watched Daria cry in a rerun Felt much deeper than season one My neighbor asked, “What’s your passion?” I said “weird hats and passive aggression” He said “you good?” I said “barely” Then danced to the Frasier theme, embarrassingly