[Intro — spoken over accordion] Now I can tell you exactly what happened. Probably. [Verse 1] It started near the back door Somewhere quarter after nine Lou said Joe had insulted Marie Joe said everything was fine Marie was laughing with somebody Pierre was missing one red shoe I saw René knock over a table René says that isn’t true By ten o’clock I had it settled Every culprit, every cause Then somebody found the missing shoe Underneath my chair Well— [Chorus] I’m right until further notice That’s the story as it stands Till somebody comes around here With a better set of facts Everybody saw it happen Everybody saw it plain Right until further notice Then we tell the tale again Hey! Tell it again! [Accordion break] [Verse 2] Now Marie insists there was no fighting Just some shouting near the bar Lou says somebody threw a bottle Nobody can find the jar Pierre remembers dancing backward With a woman dressed in green She says she never danced with Pierre But knows exactly what he means The bartender says we’re all mistaken Nothing happened after ten Which would be much more convincing If he hadn’t left at nine-fifteen [Chorus] We’re right until further notice That’s the story as it stands Till somebody comes around here With a better set of facts Everybody saw it happen Everybody saw it plain Right until further notice Then we tell the tale again [Post-Chorus — call and response] You saw it? I saw something! You know it? I know enough! Who started it? Depends who’s asking! Who finished it? Nobody yet! [Electronic drop — chopped accordion and vocal samples] Further notice Further notice Right until— Right until— [Verse 3] By midnight Joe was innocent By twelve-oh-five he wasn’t By twelve-fifteen we learned the man Was never Joe’s first cousin Lou confessed he’d moved the table Marie admitted stealing fries Pierre produced a second red shoe Which raised several questions Then René stood upon a chair And swore before us all He knew precisely what had happened— And immediately fell off [Instrumental break] [Bridge — half-time] Funny thing about a story Once everybody gets a turn It doesn’t disappear completely It just gets harder to confirm There was music There was shouting Someone definitely spilled the wine Beyond that— I reserve the right To improve this story At another time [Beat builds] [Final Chorus] Right until further notice That’s the best that I can do Here’s the version I walked in with There’s the version brought by you Everybody caught a moment Nobody caught the whole parade Right until further notice Till another witness weighs in Right until further notice Raise your glass and let it ride We can argue in the morning Tonight the band is still alive Hey! [Outro — accordion and electronic loop] Who started it? Lou! Lou: Wasn’t me! Marie! Marie: Absolutely not! Pierre? Pierre: I lost my shoe! René? René: What table? [Music stops] Wait— whose shoe is this? [Accordion sting]
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