[Intro] Help me— Nevermind. I've been exiled so long I forgot what belonging's supposed to feel like. Everybody learned the language of being human, I learned silence and called it survival. Ask me what's wrong— I malfunction. Too many thoughts, no translation. I understand the conversation, I just can't perform participation. [Chorus] Help me— Nevermind. Don't get close, I've learned closeness becomes a crime scene. Help me— Nevermind. I don't trust kindness when my history keeps manufacturing evidence. I've been hurt enough to become hostile before I'm threatened, then hate myself for becoming what I was afraid of. [Verse 2] The first half of my life was chemically claustrophobic. Trapped inside my own skin, watching everybody develop while my own development disappeared. They learned socialization. I learned isolation. Now I'm behind in a race I didn't know I was running. Two mothers, two different wounds. One gave me life without giving me safety. The other stayed close enough to exist and distant enough to teach me abandonment. Now intimacy feels like interrogation. I want someone close— then panic when they are. [Verse 3] My memory isn't a library. It's a leaking archive. Yesterday bleeds into childhood. Faces detach from names. Events lose chronology. I remember the fear better than I remember why. And food became anesthesia. I ate until movement became difficult, turned hunger into comfort, comfort into dependence, dependence into another thing I hate. Every coping mechanism eventually collects its debt. [Bridge] And I'm not innocent. That's the part I can't hide. I learned right from wrong late, and some lessons came with consequences I can't rewrite. Trauma explains me. It doesn't absolve me. I've been hurt. I've hurt people. Both are true. I'm toxic enough to recognize my own toxicity while I'm still committing it. Self-awareness without self-control is just watching yourself become the problem. [Final Chorus] Help me— Nevermind. I keep building exits then becoming terrified when people leave. Help me— No. This time, stay. I don't know how to be normal. I don't know how much of me is damage and how much is simply me. But I'm still here. So— Help me. ... Nevermind. No. I mean it this time.
