"Boots, Beef, and Bad Decisions"

[Verse 1] Am – Dm – G – C I don’t wear no spandex, just dust and disguise, F – C – Dm – E7 Got a cape made of cowhide and a lasso full of lies. Am – Dm – G – C My boots kick doors, and my aim’s not clean, F – C – E7 – Am But I once took down bandits with brisket and caffeine. [Verse 2] Am – Dm – G – C I ain’t your hero, sugar, but I look good in black, F – C – Dm – E7 Got a flask full of secrets and a plan I never track. Am – Dm – G – C I crashed a church wedding with a bull and a snack, F – C – E7 – Am Then I vanished through the kitchen, never lookin’ back. [Verse 3] Am – Dm – G – C Justice don’t sleep, but I nap hard after steak, F – C – Dm – E7 With a badge on my boot and a smile that’s fake. Am – Dm – G – C I fight crime at noon, then I barbecue late— F – C – E7 – Am Banned from three counties and at least one state. [Verse 4] Am – Dm – G – C Got the Bat-Signal branded on my butt in Amarillo, F – C – Dm – E7 By a guy with a grin and a six-string armadillo. Am – Dm – G – C We slow-danced on saddles, sang duets off-key, F – C – E7 – Am Then I rode off howlin’ like a beef-fueled mystery. [Chorus] C – G – Am – F I got boots, beef, and bad decisions, C – G – Am – E7 A trail of exes and fried ambitions. F – C – Dm – E7 My code of honor’s a little cracked, F – C – G – G7 But I tip my hat and never look back. C – G – Am – F I ride with flair, I flirt with doom, C – G – Am – E7 Drink cold sarsaparilla by the light of the moon. F – C – Dm – G I may be wanted in twelve jurisdictions— F – C – E7 – Am But I got boots, beef, and bad decisions. [Bridge – Breakdown Style] *Slows slightly with dramatic flair — spotlight moment* Dm – E7 – Am I ain’t no outlaw, I just dress the part, F – G – Am With a badge made of bacon and a crime-lovin’ heart. Dm – E7 – Am If trouble’s a town, I’m the mayor and the mission— F – C – E7 – Am Serving sweet low justice and poor nutrition. [Final Chorus – Big Swing Out + Echo] C – G – Am – F I got boots, beef, and bad decisions, C – G – Am – E7 Barbecue dreams and outlaw visions. F – C – Dm – E7 I roll like thunder through heartbreak kitchens— F – C – E7 – Am With my boots, my beef, and bad decisions. (Backing vocals echo:) Boots (boots!) Beef (beef!) And bad decisions (oh yeah!) [Outro Verse – Grand Finish | 4:15–4:45] Am – Dm – G – C So pour one more shot and cue that refrain, F – C – Dm – E7 I’ll ride out at sunrise through whiskey and rain. Am – Dm – G – C The legend’ll grow, though I barely exist— F – C – E7 – Am Just a woman in boots who the law might’ve missed. F – C – E7 – Am Yeah, I’m boots… I’m beef… and one hell of a twist.