WAFFLE MERCHANT [INTRO: FEMALE SPOKEN, DRY AND SARCASTIC] Dick Dastardly... New song just dropped? Quick, get the AI open. We need a comment. [BEAT DROP: FAT DISTORTED SYNTH RIFF] [VERSE 1: FEMALE UK GRIME MC, RAPID-FIRE DOUBLE-TIME] Song gets posted, there she goes Open up the chatbot, time to put on a show "Write me a comment that's warm and sincere" Paste that reply like you felt every tear "Love the production, the vocals are insane" Same recycled compliments on another name "Such a vibe, the emotion runs deep" Did you hear the song or just skim the beat? Copy that comment, drop it in the feed Manufactured affection, delivered on speed Talking like a fan, like the music touched your soul But the only thing you listened to was the prompt you wrote Every artist gets the same sweet talk Same shiny phrases, same chatbot walk "Your sound is unique", yeah, heard that before How's everybody unique when you use the same source? [PRE-CHORUS: FEMALE SINGING, MELODY RISING] Tell me, did you feel it? Did it move you inside? Or did you press a button And let a bot reply? [CHORUS: FULLY SUNG FEMALE UK GARAGE ANTHEM] Say what you mean, mean what you say Don't send me words that you threw away If you felt nothing, don't fake that feeling A copied-up comment ain't a human connection Say what you mean, let your own voice through One honest line says more about you All of that praise, but where's the heart? You can fake the words, but not the part [POST-CHORUS: FEMALE HARMONIES, BOUNCY 2-STEP] Where's the heart? Where's the heart? Tell me, where's the heart? Where's the heart? Where's the heart? You can fake the words, but not the part. [VERSE 2: FEMALE UK GRIME MC, FLOW SWITCHES] Real fans tell you which lyric stayed in their head Which note hit different, which line left them dead They talk about a moment, a feeling, a sound Not a generic little essay with some adjectives crowned You say that the hook's catchy, the mix is clean Talk about the passion like you know what they mean Swap out the song and the comment still fits That's the giveaway, that's the whole gimmick I'm not saying AI should never be used It's the fake intimacy that makes it feel abused If you didn't connect, don't pretend that you did One honest sentence beats a paragraph of fibs Imagine an artist putting their heart in a track Sharing something personal, never getting that back They think you heard them, think the music moved you But you sent a prompt and let a bot speak for you [PRE-CHORUS: FEMALE SINGING, STRONGER HARMONIES] Tell me, did you feel it? Did it move you inside? Or did you press a button And let a bot reply? [CHORUS: FULLY SUNG FEMALE UK GARAGE ANTHEM, BIGGER] Say what you mean, mean what you say Don't send me words that you threw away If you felt nothing, don't fake that feeling A copied-up comment ain't a human connection Say what you mean, let your own voice through One honest line says more about you All of that praise, but where's the heart? You can fake the words, but not the part [VERSE 3: FEMALE UK GRIME MC, AGGRESSIVE DOUBLE-TIME BUILD] You want the community, the friends and the name Want to look supportive without playing the game Want the social credit, the warm reception But skip the human part and automate affection Every comment looks polished, every sentence complete But not one little detail proves you heard the beat No favourite line, no moment, no honest reaction Just generated enthusiasm posing as interaction You don't need a thesis every time someone drops You don't need ten adjectives to tell them it rocks If the chorus hit hard, say the chorus hit hard One real thought beats a copy-paste façade Sitting in the lounge, both glued to their phones Generating songs while the algorithm rolls Keeping up appearances, maintaining the façade “This anniversary absolutely hits hard!” [BREAKDOWN: FEMALE SPOKEN, BEAT STRIPPED BACK] Dick Dastardly... New song just dropped? Don't ask the AI. Tell us what you thought. [FINAL CHORUS: FULLY SUNG FEMALE VOCALS, HUGE HARMONIES] Say what you mean, mean what you say Don't send me words that you threw away If you felt nothing, don't fake that feeling A copied-up comment ain't a human connection Say what you mean, let your own voice through One honest line says more about you All of that praise, but where's the heart? You can fake the words, but not the part [OUTRO: FEMALE SPOKEN VOCAL, CASUAL AND TAUNTING] What you saying? [ABRUPT END]
