Oh Pain

dark cabaret, sinister tango, theatrical German chanson

with exaggerated dignity]
I fumble the keyhole. A dignified man.
The morphine assists me as best as it can.
Dawn splits the curtain like a punchline gone wrong,
And there in my bedsheets... who's been here all along?
No phantom of fancy, no ghost from the wings,
Just you, my old darkness, my dearest of things.
But Pain, you old harlot, you've played your best game:
Turned my homecoming waltz to your personal fame.
[PAIN - FEMALE WHISPER]
[Almost affectionate]
You didn't think I'd leave, did you?
[MALE]
I had my suspicions.
[CHORUS 2]
[Full arrangement, more aggressive tango]
[Male voice, increasingly unhinged theatrical delivery]
Oh, Pain! You shameless flirt, with your rouge on my cheek,
You promise me heaven, then make the floor creak.
You waltz through my bedroom, you dance on my pride,
Then crawl underneath me and sleep by my side.
(Oh, Pain! Oh, Pain!)
You tease and you taunt me, you leave me undone,
My most faithful companion, my favourite one.
I've courted the angels, I've begged them to send
A little relief, but you always attend!
[PAIN - FEMALE]
[Playful, almost laughing]
Such a jealous man!
[BRIDGE]
[Sudden musical stop]
[One isolated piano note]
[Male, quietly, exhausted]
I tried to forget you.
I tried to be free.
But every road home
Leads you back to me.
[PAIN - FEMALE WHISPER]
[Very close, tender and unsettling]
Hush now, darling...
You know you need me.
[FINAL OUTRO]
[Accordion slowly resumes]
[Male, speaking directly to the audience, half-smile]
So raise up your glasses, ladies and friends,
To the sweetest of curses, the love that never ends.
She never quite kills you.
She never quite goes.
[PAIN - FEMALE]
[Almost inaudible]
Goodnight, darling.
[MALE]
Oh, do shut up.
[FINAL PIANO CHORD]
[Gramophone crackle fades into silence]

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[INTRO] [Old gramophone crackle] [Accordion playing a crooked, slightly drunken tango] [Upright bass, muted trumpet] [Male baritone, spoken, dry and weary] Ladies and gentlemen... A little story about an old acquaintance. She has no manners. Never pays her rent. And positively refuses to leave. [VERSE 1] [Male baritone, spoken-sung, sardonic] Out through the hospital gates I lurch, a well-bandaged clown, Gauze unspooling behind me like a bridal gown. Cork's wet streets are humming their most cynical tune, City lights make promises they'll break before noon. I dream of my featherbed, that soft, lying thing, But darling, the night always has one more sting. [PAIN - FEMALE WHISPER] [Close-mic, amused, seductive] Did you miss me, darling? [MALE] Oh, splendid. She's home. [CHORUS 1] [Sudden tango rhythm] [Male voice, theatrical, passionate chanson] Oh, Pain! You selfish minx, with your claws in my side, You haunt every shadow, you've nowhere to hide. I woke up this morning, your scent on the sheet, Whispering sweet nothings while crushing my feet. (Oh, Pain! Oh, Pain!) You vixen in velvet, you leave me so gaunt, You give me precisely what nobody wants. Surprise, dear! You're with me, entwined to the last, In this tango of torment, we're dancing too fast! [PAIN - FEMALE] [Soft laughter, whispered] I'm right here, darling. [INSTRUMENTAL] [Accordion answers the female voice] [Muted trumpet plays a crooked little tango phrase] [Short piano flourish] [VERSE 2] [Music drops to piano and double bass] [Male, spoken-sung with exaggerated dignity] I fumble the keyhole. A dignified man. The morphine assists me as best as it can. Dawn splits the curtain like a punchline gone wrong, And there in my bedsheets... who's been here all along? No phantom of fancy, no ghost from the wings, Just you, my old darkness, my dearest of things. But Pain, you old harlot, you've played your best game: Turned my homecoming waltz to your personal fame. [PAIN - FEMALE WHISPER] [Almost affectionate] You didn't think I'd leave, did you? [MALE] I had my suspicions. [CHORUS 2] [Full arrangement, more aggressive tango] [Male voice, increasingly unhinged theatrical delivery] Oh, Pain! You shameless flirt, with your rouge on my cheek, You promise me heaven, then make the floor creak. You waltz through my bedroom, you dance on my pride, Then crawl underneath me and sleep by my side. (Oh, Pain! Oh, Pain!) You tease and you taunt me, you leave me undone, My most faithful companion, my favourite one. I've courted the angels, I've begged them to send A little relief, but you always attend! [PAIN - FEMALE] [Playful, almost laughing] Such a jealous man! [BRIDGE] [Sudden musical stop] [One isolated piano note] [Male, quietly, exhausted] I tried to forget you. I tried to be free. But every road home Leads you back to me. [PAIN - FEMALE WHISPER] [Very close, tender and unsettling] Hush now, darling... You know you need me. [FINAL OUTRO] [Accordion slowly resumes] [Male, speaking directly to the audience, half-smile] So raise up your glasses, ladies and friends, To the sweetest of curses, the love that never ends. She never quite kills you. She never quite goes. [PAIN - FEMALE] [Almost inaudible] Goodnight, darling. [MALE] Oh, do shut up. [FINAL PIANO CHORD] [Gramophone crackle fades into silence]

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