He’s got a cardboard crown and a golden soul Diggin' up secrets in a gopher hole Four-inch legs but a ten-foot sass Stay off the driveway, don’t touch his grass He’s the CEO of the septic tank The only dog banned from the local bank KUKU’S THE KING, KUKU’S THE BOSS He’ll bark at your laundry, he don’t give a toss Low-rider tyrant with a megaphone mouth The rudest little critter in the deep, deep South He’s judging your lawn, he’s judging your hair Kuku’s the King and he just don’t care! He woke up Mrs. Henderson at half-past three Using that megaphone to bark at a flea Then he stood on her porch and looked through the pane To tell her that her curtains were “too mundane” He stole Neighbor Joe’s left flip-flop Then led a high-speed chase ‘til the local cop KUKU’S THE KING, KUKU’S THE BOSS He’ll bark at your laundry, he don’t give a toss Low-rider tyrant with a megaphone mouth The rudest little critter in the deep, deep South He’s judging your lawn, he’s judging your hair Kuku’s the King and he just don’t care! huehuehuehuehue ehehe aiyoooooooo “Launch the goat!” he screams in the night A furry little general lookin' for a fight He’s got a spreadsheet for every offense Building his empire behind the chain-link fence KUKU’S THE KING, KUKU’S THE BOSS He’ll bark at your laundry, he don’t give a toss Low-rider tyrant with a megaphone mouth The rudest little critter in the deep, deep South He’s judging your lawn, he’s judging your hair Kuku’s the King and he just don’t care! Yeah, he’s small in the legs but big in the hate Don’t let him catch you at the trailer gate! (Megaphone feedback screech) “GET OFF THE PROPERTY!”
