Verse 1 I used to be comfortable sitting alone in a room with a book and a drink and a view of the moon Never needed a crowd, never needed applause, never needed somebody to tell me my value was true I had a schedule, a plan and a purpose, a couple of goals and a reasonable route Then something slipped through, and honestly, that’s the part I still can’t figure out There wasn’t a crash, there wasn’t a spark, there wasn’t a scene from a Hollywood script No dramatic goodbye, no crossing a line, no moment I look at and say, “That was it” Just one little thought that got into my head and decided that paying rent wasn’t enough Now it owns half the building and throws parties at night while I’m trying to shut off the lights Hook What happened to me? I’ve been collecting theories like trophies and keeping them lined on a shelf Every one of them sounded convincing at first, then collapsed under scrutiny all by itself What happened to me? I’ve been conducting investigations for months and I’m both the detective and thief Building a case against all of my thoughts while they’re busy appealing the brief Verse 2 First I blamed it on stress, then I blamed it on age, then I blamed it on pressure and deadlines and change Then I blamed it on boredom, on wanting excitement, on running in circles, on feeling constrained Then I blamed it on loneliness, that would’ve been great if I didn’t enjoy being left on my own I like quiet mornings, I like empty sidewalks, I like getting lost and not checking my phone So if loneliness is the answer, explain why solitude still feels like home And if solitude still feels like home, explain why my mind keeps refusing to go I’ve got more contradictions than evidence, more questions than confidence Every time I think that I solved it, another exception appears in the documents Hook What happened to me? I keep looking for patterns in places where patterns were never intended to be Like there’s a sentence hidden somewhere in the static that might finally set me free What happened to me? I’ve spent so much time trying to understand everything perfectly, line by line That I never stopped once to consider the possibility maybe there’s nothing to find Verse 3 So I did all the healthy things people suggest when they notice you’re trapped in a loop I went for long walks, I filled up some journals, I talked to my friends, I got back to the truth I worked out, I slept more, I stayed off my phone, I meditated, hydrated, adjusted my food I touched grass so much that the grass probably thinks that we’re friends and should hang out soon Some days it worked, some days it didn’t Some days I felt wise, some days I felt finished Some days I’d laugh at how stupid it sounded Some days it felt like my whole life depended On solving a riddle nobody had written Winning a trial nobody attended Reading a map that kept changing directions Every time I got close to the ending Bridge Then I had a thought and I hated it instantly What if the puzzle survives on dependency? What if attention’s the food that it eats? What if analysis is fuel for the beast? What if the thing that I’m trying to defeat Gets stronger each time that I schedule a meeting? What if the answer’s not hidden in meaning? What if the answer is simply… stop feeding it? Final Hook What happened to me? Maybe the question was never the key and that’s why the lock never opened for me Maybe the need to explain every feeling is really the thing that was keeping me weak What happened to me? Maybe one day I’ll wake up and notice the question has finally loosened its grip Not because I solved it, not because I cracked it Just because I stopped giving a damn about it Outro And honestly? That might be the funniest ending of all. Spend years trying to understand a mystery… Just to find out the mystery needed attention More than it needed solving.
