Intro (Spoken / Announcement Voice) Attention creators, gamers, and accidental professionals. Before you go, On Air Please review the following guidelines. Verse 1 Check your mic, check your cam Hit “Start Streaming,” count to ten Smile like everything’s fine Hope the audio’s online Talking big, feeling brave Ten minutes in… you were muted Chat’s been waving the whole time Typing “WE CAN’T HEAR YOU” in all caps Pre-Chorus You nod, you laugh, you keep it cool You think you’re running the room Then you see the chat explode And your soul just leaves the booth Chorus Welcome to Streaming 101 Rule number one — it’s never done Check your mic, check it twice You still won’t get it right Don’t eat chips into the mic Don’t rage at lag like it’s a fight Do your best, accept the mess Congratulations — you’re on Verse 2 Crunchy snacks? Bad idea Keyboard louder than your fears “Just one more game,” famous last words Three hours later, sun’s reversed Reading chat while mid-jump Miss the ledge, fall straight down Blame the game, blame the lag Definitely not your timing, chat Pre-Chorus 2 Water’s empty, coffee’s gone Chair imprint’s getting strong You say “five more minutes, fam” Chat knows that’s a scam Chorus Welcome to Streaming 101 Rule number two — hydrate, son Coffee helps, but not that much Your spine would like a break or lunch Don’t forget you’re still a human Not a content generation unit If it breaks, laugh it off That’s the job — congrats, you’re on Bridge (Mock Serious / PSA Voice) Please remember: Silence does not mean failure. Chat being quiet does not mean they hate you. And yes… You are still On. Final Chorus Welcome to Streaming 101 Rule number three — have some fun Talk it through when chat’s asleep Someone’s always lurking deep Do your best, expect the glitch Smile when everything goes sideways If it crashes, hit restart That’s the art — congrats, you’re on Outro This has been a public service announcement. You will forget all of this. And that’s okay.
