Peanuts packed, no gat, I’m like Snickers The sweet treat make the girls drop their knickers They drop mine too and I feel the tongues flicker Reward of a lollipop and smiley face sticker Man with a van yeah I’m living the dream In the park all summer just slinging the ice cream In the dark all winter, electricity is pricey It’s not too bad though, it’s honestly quite nice Open road yes, but I’ve never been a roadman I studied karate. Black belt, 1st Dan. 2 tours in the Army. Iraq, Afghanistan. And I’ve never ate a meal that wasn’t from a tin can Not a fan of the sand, so I can’t be doing beaches Can’t go near a school or my protection order breaches Not like that, got in a fight with a teacher Thought I nobbed his daughter so I rearranged his features Whacked out mind full of vinegar and piss Half the things I’m saying didn’t happen like this But the half that did? That’s more than enough To make a man of mystery out of ordinary stuff Rhyming rum soaked raisins braised in carnality Banging from my tongue in a fatality: Shang Tsung. Tatty moral fabric, the tapestry’s looking ratty and I’m pulling the string and it’s unravelling like a marriage and I’m makin the missus be my mistress and I’m tapping it, Tricking her business to be hoeing and now I’m cashing it, Other people she be controlling and now we trafficking, Why do ladies stay with me? Guessing I’m just the handsomest… Most handsome. Never slack on syntax But I don’t correct my grammar cos I’m chill and relaxed. I’m a gastrolithic mystery, my gizzard is stone, A cold blooded Komodo, yo, I roll lone In my swamp home, waiting for a lady to chomp Like a sexual Shrek just trying to find his donkey Pretty fly for a honkey, cos I'm bringing the raunch I’m singing in the wrong key, but I’m holding the conch Whacked out mind full of vinegar and piss Half the things I’m saying didn’t happen like this But the half that did? That’s more than enough To make a man of mystery out of ordinary stuff Spank the bottom of the bottle and I’m spilling the sauce Everyday I’m hustling: Richi Ricking the Ross Basting the ribs and the rack of this chick on her back, Manner causing her to stammer like I’m hammering a brick with a tack, Sex wax she bored, gripping, I'm surfing the crash, Inner tube spraying all the wake up in the tunnel and splash. Splish, splash, I was taking a bath, And now I'm laying down the rock HUT! and she throwing it back. Unhook the button and I intercept a blitz to the sack Touching down in her end zone, I’m tryna convert Her beaver was a wide receiver and I’m making it work Got damn for days, pert, she was slapping that tail Warn her colony be wary of a dangerous male But I’m not scary I’m just horny like a unicorn: mythic Divine? The jury’s out and the method ain’t scientific. Whacked out mind full of vinegar and piss Half the things I’m saying didn’t happen like this But the half that did? That’s more than enough To make a man of mystery out of ordinary stuff
