[Intro - Spoken, Calm Female Voice] Okay... this got out of hand. [Official Male Voice] Situation report. Two Swedes. One Dane. One American. [Pause] Nobody knows why he's here. [Female Voice] He's American. [Male Voice] Right. Never mind. [Beat Drop] [Chorus - Female Lead] What are we starting World War Three? I left you people unsupervised for twenty fucking minutes MiniMage has a theory Ojac has a link DUDE wasn't invited He's American so obviously he's in Two Swedes versus one Dane I was doing just fine Then America showed up like the odds needed help What are we starting World War Three? [Background Voices] World War Three? [Female Lead] Should I notify the neighbors? Should I put the kettle on? I don't know the protocol for when a roast goes international [Instrumental Break] [Verse 1 - Female Lead] MiniMage keeps explaining which is brave at this point Every answer raises questions and somehow he keeps going Ojac's standing next to him with evidence prepared Nobody asked for peer review but thank God somebody cared Then DUDE came walking in like, "What's going on in here?" Saw two Scandinavian countries and signed himself up as number three [Break] No invitation No hesitation [Male Choir] AMERICA. [Female Voice] Of course. [Emergency Broadcast] Update. Greenland has been mentioned. [Female Voice] Who mentioned Greenland? [Male Voice] Nobody panic. [Another Male Voice] DUDE is typing. [All Voices] Oh shit. [Chorus - Female Lead] What are we starting World War Three? Do I need a tiny helmet? Is there paperwork for me? Sweden brought an argument Greenland got mentioned so America brought itself Denmark brought another song despite repeated claims of "final" What are we starting World War Three? [Background Voices] World War Three? [Female Voice] Oh shiiiit. [Breakdown - Official Situation Report] MiniMage is still explaining. [Choir] Still explaining... [Official Voice] Ojac has opened another tab. [Choir] Another tab... [Official Voice] DUDE is recruiting countries that haven't joined us yet. [Female Voice] DUDE. No. [Official Voice] Germany has been mentioned. [Alarm] [Female Voice] Put Germany back. [Pause] At this rate by breakfast we'll have NATO in the thread. [Male Voice, Distant] What about Australia? [Female Voice] WHO SAID AUSTRALIA? [Instrumental Drop] [Bridge - Spoken Female Voice] Okay. Nobody mention Greenland. DUDE... Put Germany back. Ojac, close the browser. MiniMage [Pause] Actually, you keep talking. You're basically writing these for me. [Final Chorus - Female Lead, Full Ensemble] What are we starting World War Three? Nobody knows what happened but apparently there's a beat No one gained territory No one lost a fleet Denmark made three fucking songs and Sweden brought receipts What are we starting World War Three? [Choir] World War Three! [Female Lead] Nah. We're just Scandinavians with Wi-Fi and one American who heard "Greenland" and had to butt in. [Silence] [Outro - Spoken Female Voice] Final shot. For real. [Pause] MiniMage... don't type.
