I hear the name you gave me bite behind my teeth Every hard consonant lands where I can't leave It carries what I did, the nights I made you brace The way my silence taught your nerves to know my shape I used to spit it back like that could make it false Then wore it till my own voice dropped out of the sound Two ways to lose myself each time it came around Refuse the wound I caused, or let it take me whole Say my name wrong The way the damage taught you Let every hard edge stay I know exactly what it names When the last sound falls My voice comes after it Not over it Not gone The first name hits before I know I've tensed to fight I used to drown it out or wear it through the night Now I let the whole word finish, every sound No softer pronunciation turns the damage down Then somewhere in the quiet after it is said The name that kept me human rises in my head It does not cross yours out or make my actions clean It gives me just enough of me to answer what yours means Say my name wrong The way the damage taught you Let every hard edge stay I know exactly what it names When the last sound falls My voice comes after it Not over it Not gone The hard name starts again Before my answer finds its pitch I miss the opening Come in halfway, voice split It keeps sounding underneath I lose the word I meant to say Try once more The edges scrape This time the answer doesn't break MY ANSWER CRACKS, BUT IT COMES OUT! Say my name wrong I know why you had to Let every hard edge stay I answer to what it names When the last sound falls My voice comes through after it Not over it Not gone The last consonant keeps ringing I miss the first beat Then answer Late, rough, audible
