[Spoken Intro] You asked if you triggered me again. I said no. Because technically… you didn’t. I did this to myself. [Verse 1] I’m sorry my head picked you Out of everybody in the room Turned something safe into something terrifying And somehow made it your problem too You didn’t pull the fucking trigger You didn’t put these thoughts inside my head But now you know exactly where it hurts And I hate that you can see it when I bend I keep saying I’ll make it disappear Like I can unlearn what my brain decided But I don’t even know if this will ever leave And I’m so fucking tired of trying [Pre-Chorus] You tell me not to feel guilty But guilt doesn’t listen that well Because when somebody I care about hurts My brain says I caused it myself [Chorus] So don’t ask me to be strong tonight I’ve been strong for eight fucking years I’m tired of holding myself together While everybody says I’m doing so well from here I can’t promise that I’m okay I can’t promise the fear will be gone I can’t promise I won’t fall apart But maybe falling apart isn’t the same as being gone So don’t ask me to be strong Just stay until the noise gets small I don’t need to win this fight tonight I just need to make it through it all [Verse 2] I almost didn’t tell you what I wanted Because I knew it would hurt you too And somehow protecting everybody else Still feels easier than telling the truth “I’m tired” doesn’t fucking cover it There aren’t words big enough for this weight I’m sick of fighting with a brain That can turn love into something I’m afraid of And maybe you’ll always be a trigger God, I hate admitting that out loud Because you never asked to be responsible For pulling me back when I’m going down [Pre-Chorus] And I keep apologizing For things you never blamed me for Like if I say sorry enough times Maybe I’ll stop feeling like a burden anymore [Chorus] So don’t ask me to be strong tonight I’ve been strong for eight fucking years I’m tired of holding myself together While everybody says I’m doing so well from here I can’t promise that I’m okay I can’t promise the fear will be gone I can’t promise I won’t fall apart But maybe falling apart isn’t the same as being gone So don’t ask me to be strong Just stay until the noise gets small I don’t need to win this fight tonight I just need to make it through it all [Bridge — almost whispered] What if the pen isn’t enough tonight? What if I’ve run out of words to write? Then maybe I don’t need another metaphor Maybe I need somebody beside me on the floor No fixing No promises No telling me how brave I’ve been Just— “I’m here.” “Stay here.” “Let tomorrow happen before you decide how this ends.” [Final Chorus] Don’t ask me to be strong tonight Strength is the thing that wore me thin I’ve survived every night before this one But God, I’m tired of surviving like this I still can’t promise I’m okay And maybe that’s all I can give Not some pretty fucking happy ending Just one more night I choose to live So don’t ask me to be strong You can let me be exhausted instead Let me shake, let me cry, let me unravel Without believing that means the end I don’t have to win this fight tonight I don’t have to know when this gets better Tonight I only have to stay [Outro] I’m tired. Not gone. There’s a difference
