A grandma at the piano, A family gathered near, Their voices joined in singing Favorite songs I love to hear. My heart was flying for them, Their joy was beautiful to see— But there before my very eyes Was the dream I'd held for me. I've dreamed of generations With a place for everyone, Of children bringing children home, Of songs and laughter, love. I've pictured all the years ahead, Making memories all around— And I've had to leave that picture More times than I can count. I watched my first dream fall apart, Then tried to make it whole. But hurt returned, and once again I had to let it go. I dreamed my sisters' families Would sing and laugh as one— But life took turns I couldn't change, And that dream, too, was gone. So here I am, yet again, Letting go of what might have been. I've walked this road so many times, Yet still the tears fall now and then. I love the life I'm living, I wouldn't trade the joy I've gained— But I'm so tired of letting go Of that same old dream yet again. Then Rick came walking into my life, And love brought something new— A chance to build the family I'd dreamed of seeing through. For seventeen years I gave my heart To help that dream come true— And though our love is everything, That dream has fallen through. I've watched my dreams unravel, Then built my life anew, I've found a thousand blessings I never dreamed could come true. And now I have a husband Whose love is home to me— A life of peace and laughter, More than either of us thought we'd see. He sees a life beyond his dreams, And I can see it too. The freedom and the quiet joy, The things we get to do. And oh, how much I treasure Each ordinary day— But loving all I've been given Doesn't make this longing go away. So here I am, yet again, Letting go of what might have been. I've walked this road so many times, Yet still the tears fall now and then. I'm grateful beyond measure, I wouldn't trade the joy I've gained— But I'm so tired of letting go Of that same old dream yet again. And then my thoughts went to Aaron, And the dreams he must have known. Perhaps he pictured something different, A future of his own. It's clear to me we didn't see things Through the same paradigm back then— But I know how much a dream can hurt When you have to let it go again. So if my heart could speak to his Without reopening the pain, I'd simply say, "I love you," And let those words remain. So here I am, yet again, With tears for what might have been. But I can smile for someone else And celebrate the joy they're in. I wouldn't take one moment Of their joy to spare my pain— I'll celebrate the love they have While letting go again. A grandma at the piano, A family singing near, And I am truly happy For the love that brought them here. I have a beautiful life to live, And blessings without end— I thought I'd finished letting go, But here I am . . . yet again.
