# SNARK POWER – SOLVING PROBLEMS YOU CREATED [Intro: Bright retro organ, jaunty guitar, finger snaps] [Spoken: Cheerful male announcer] Need fuel? Need power? Need somebody else to clean up your mess? [Chorus: Bright corporate singers] Snark Power! We’re here today! Keeping your engines on their way! Snark Power! Pull on in! We’ll top you up and make you grin! [Spoken: Pod-grown attendant, overly friendly] Welcome to Snark Power, valued customer! Please remain calm while I efficiently address the consequences of your personal decisions. [Verse: Light bouncy jingle] Refined and ready, night or day, We’ll get you fueled and on your way! Pumps still running, service too, There’s always something we can do! [Chorus] Snark Power! Bright and new! Solving problems you created for you! Snark Power! Yes indeed! Friendly service for your urgent need! [Breakdown: music warps slightly, unsettling synth hum] [Spoken: Pod-grown attendant, glitching] I am happy to serve. I am always happy to serve. The roots go very deep. There is no need to be alarmed. Your appointment has already been scheduled. Please proceed to the nearest service facility— [brief static] —facility— [small pause] Why am I still awake? [Music snaps back to bright jingle] [Chorus: Extra cheerful] Snark Power! Stop on by! We’ll keep your motor running high! Snark Power! You’ll agree: Best service this side of reality! [Tag: full chorus] Snark Power! Solving problems you created! [Spoken: pod attendant, perfectly reset] Thank you for choosing Snark Power. Have a pleasant forever.
