[Intro] [soft room tone Chair creak] So You really booked this appointment At this hour With this name on the door [Verse 1] “Hi My name is Doctor Bigcock” You choke on a laugh Pretend you misread the tag You say you’re here for a “checkup” Full body Top to bottom “Be thorough Please” You sit on the paper It crinkles like it’s blushing You watch my hands Don’t watch my eyes [Chorus] “Breathe in Breathe out Wider Hold it” You ask if this is standard I say “very” You ask how long it takes I say “depends how much you can take” [Verse 2] You kick off your shoes Then your doubt Buttons One by one Falling like reasons to behave You ask why they call me that I lean in Mouth by your ear “Professional secret” You say you’ve been “so tense” I tap my pen against your thigh “Tell me where it hurts” You guide my hand [Chorus] “Breathe in Breathe out Wider Hold it” You ask if it’s on your file I say “every dirty detail” You say you’re scared of needles I say “good thing I work by hand” [Bridge] You whisper “Doctor…” Half plea Half dare I say “this part Is highly specialized” Lights hum Clock quits counting You bite your lip I bite my tongue “Hi My name is Doctor Bigcock” You repeat it this time Like a prayer Not a joke [Chorus] “Breathe in Breathe out Wider Hold it” You ask when you should come again I sign the form Circle “as needed” And write my number twice
