[Intro — Tavern Noise / Mandolin ] [Spoken] Barkeep. Another ale. And fetch me some ink. I've got words for a bastard. [dark mandolin solo] [Verse 1 — First Letter] To the bastard in the black cloak who keeps ruining my plans, you swapped the runes above my doorway, put lightning through my hands. You whisper nonsense while I'm sleeping, hide my wand beneath the stairs, told the duke that I was mad— which frankly was a touch unfair. You turned my fireball backwards. You made my potion blue. Every time I nearly fix my life, I find some trace of you. So if you're somewhere listening, here's a promise from me: One day I'll drag you from the dark and finally be free. [Chorus — Tavern Gang Vocals] HEY! Here's to the bastard, the devil in my chair! The one who knows my every weakness 'cause somehow he was there! I swear I'll catch him, swear I'll beat him, swear I'll make him disappear— So raise another bloody glass to the bastard in the mirror! [Instrumental — Rowdy Fiddle / Stomps] [Verse 2 — The Reply] To the fool in the red coat, I received your little threat. Funny how you only remember what you'd rather forget. I never hid your wand, old friend. You left it by the bed. And those runes above your doorway? You wrote them yourself instead. That fireball went backwards because you cast it drunk at three. And when the duke asked who was talking, you pointed straight at me. You blame me when the room goes quiet. You blame me when you're scared. You made me carry every thing you couldn't stand to bear. So keep calling me the villain. Keep pretending we're at war. But you've been fighting your reflection since long before I had a voice. [Chorus — Bigger] HEY! Here's to the bastard in my mirror, the devil in my chair! The one who knows my every weakness 'cause somehow he was there! I swore I'd catch him, swore I'd beat him— but something isn't clear: Why does every wound I give him leave the blood upon me here? [Instrumental — Music Falters / Tavern Quietens] [Bridge — Darker ] Two letters on the table. Same ink. Same crooked hand. Same wax upon the parchment. Same bloody wizard's brand. "You ruined everything." "I tried." "You drove them all away." "I know." "You made me hate myself." "I kept us breathing." "That doesn't make it right." "No." [Pause] "But it doesn't make it nothing." [Slow Build] So how do you kill your enemy when killing him kills you? How do you banish half yourself and call the other half the truth? Maybe I don't have to pardon every rotten thing I've done. Maybe I just stop pretending there were ever two of us. [Final Chorus — Full Tavern] HEY! Here's to the bastard in my mirror! I know him by his scars! The fool who burned a dozen bridges then blamed it on the stars! I don't have to call him innocent. I don't have to call him right. But maybe I can stop declaring war on him every fucking night. So pour one for the man I was. Pour one for who comes next. Pour one for every version of me I haven't buried yet. I spent my whole damn life trying to make that bastard disappear— Turns out there ain't no empty chair. There's only me inside the mirror. [Outro — Single Mandolin / Quiet Tavern] [Spoken] Barkeep... I think I owe somebody an apology. [Looks at Empty Chair] And apparently... I owe him for the ale too. [Tavern Laughter] [Final Instrumental/Tavern ensemble]
