Reality of "Content"

I wake up, another day, it's all the same. The sun's out, I see it from a distance. Wonder if I'll visit. (I'll stay inside.) Turn on, flickers free. Logins that are greeting me: Who is it now? No one. It's like I won; can focus on what should be done: panicking Open, the apps that remember me, load the files that I need. I start again. Brush strokes, as I choke; waiting for some room to be. (I don't think I remember me) Burnout (burn it all...) Expecting an angry call. (I'll do it all.) Push it down. Masterfully. There's people that wait for me. (I'm drowning; but can't be seen.) Swim or sink. As I shift and try to do the best I can, the very very best I can (the absolute best I can.) I think I'll fail it. Waiting for the pin to drop, the rage to come; the violent talk. (I will comply I will comply) I will, I will, I will.. (At least I'll try) Silence: There's a secret thought, there's meaning; not a lot. Let me try some more. (Be an object, objective object.) Okay. Please be done now...Please be done now...Please be done now...Please be done now...Please be done now... Please? (I have to do more) (Change this) Whispers in my ear; a dreadful silent fear. (Of course I'll do it.) Fingers laying gently of the keyboard, a click of a mouse that rings so loud. Scratches on the tablet from the big pen, twirling around so forcefully (gently now..) It's never enough. (Wake up, wake up.) In my skills I'll trust (trust, trust) There's just so much.... There's way too much. Edit, Logo, 3D, Cover art, Animation, New creations.. coming more. Crafting 3D worlds, drawing pretty girls. I need a distraction. (I'm crumbling) Everything is way to expensive; anything I make is eaten all up. (Minuses) Wake up, bake up: brand new worlds. Waiting for the pin to drop. (I'm waiting for the pin to drop) Nevermind. (It's fine.) I'll start again.