Normative Guy

NORMATIVE GUY [Verse 1] Modern humans in the realm of a normative Guy Standing in line with a number and tie He says, “State your purpose.” I say, “Mostly survive.” He looks at the clipboard— How tall? Five foot something with my shoes on tight Six foot two if the mood is right Seven feet deep in a satellite night But you can’t put that down, so— How tall? [Pre-Chorus] Measure my arms Measure my head Measure the distance From alive to dead Put me in columns Put me in rows Tell me the average Everybody knows [Chorus] Normative Guy, Normative Guy Got a little ruler and a big bow tie Says, “You’ll fit in somewhere if you really try” Modern humans in the realm of a normative Guy How tall? How wide? How long you been keeping that animal inside? How good? How strange? On a scale of one to ten, how much can you change? [Verse 2] I met a woman made entirely of plans Had ten little futures folded in her hands She said, “Pick one quickly.” I said, “I don’t understand.” Then a voice from the ceiling said— How tall? The moon said twelve The sun said nine The ocean refused to stand in line A dog walked past with no design Nobody asked him— How tall? [Pre-Chorus] Measure the window Measure the door Measure the things We don’t measure anymore Measure ambition Measure regret Measure the dreams We haven’t ruined yet [Chorus] Normative Guy, Normative Guy Got a little ruler and a big bow tie Says, “You’ll fit in somewhere if you really try” Modern humans in the realm of a normative Guy How tall? How wide? How long you been keeping that animal inside? How good? How strange? On a scale of one to ten, how much can you change? [Bridge — spoken] Name? Human. Occupation? Human. Reason for being here? Unclear. Height? …What? HOW TALL? Tall enough to see over yesterday. Short enough to duck when tomorrow comes flying. Exactly the height of a person standing where I’m standing. Silence. Sir, that is not a valid measurement. [Breakdown] One little box Two little boxes Three little boxes in a row Check yes Check no Check “I don’t know” One little life Two little lives Everybody quantify— HOW TALL? [Final Chorus] Normative Guy, Normative Guy Drawing straight lines through a crooked sky Everybody’s normal when you average the lie Modern humans in the realm of a normative Guy How tall? Tall enough. How strange? Strange enough. How human? Human enough. And the clipboard catches fire. [Outro] Modern humans Modern humans Modern humans in the realm of a normative Guy How tall? …Why?