[Spoken Intro] They say there ain’t no such thing as a dumb question. Well… I got questions. [Verse 1] If shoes come as a pair, Why’s there one parakeet? If they call it a boxing ring, Why’s the blamed thing square? If corn oil comes from corn, What’s baby oil made from? If a word’s wrong in the dictionary, How would anybody know? [Chorus] They say there ain’t no dumb questions, I reckon somebody lied. Every time I start to wonder, Common sense runs off and hides. I ain’t sayin’ I need answers, I’m just thinkin’ out loud again. They say there ain’t no dumb questions… Well, I got a few for them. [Verse 2] If the early bird gets the worm, Ain’t the early worm in trouble? If fat chance and slim chance Mean the same, explain that one. Why’s cargo sent by ship, But a shipment sent by truck? Why do we push the remote harder When the batteries are done? Why do I turn the radio down When I’m lookin’ for a street? Does my truck see better Without a bluegrass beat? [Chorus] They say there ain’t no dumb questions, I reckon somebody lied. Every time I start to wonder, Common sense runs off and hides. I ain’t sayin’ I need answers, I’m just thinkin’ out loud again. They say there ain’t no dumb questions… Well, I got a few for them. [Verse 3] Why does glue stay in the bottle, But stick to everything else? If somebody says, “Don’t look now,” Why do we always look? If two wrongs don’t make a right, Would three get any closer? And why does a round pizza Come inside a square box… Then get cut in triangles? [Pause] My wife just stares at me. [Final Chorus] They say there ain’t no dumb questions, Well, bless whoever said it first. Give me five more minutes thinkin’ And I guarantee one worse. From a pair of shoes to one parakeet, I’ve barely even begun. If there really ain’t no dumb questions… I’m gonna keep askin’ till I find one. [Outro] Honey… Why do we call ’em hemorrhoids Instead of asteroids? [Music Stop] [Wife] Go to bed.
