[Intro] Yeah… looking back now From stages where the lights don't blind me no more Let me tell you how it started [Verse 1] Dad walked in, eyes already burning Snatched that Sega Genesis like it owed him money I borrowed it 'cause we was broke, couldn't buy our own Supposed to watch my little brothers, instead I was zoned Apartment complex, kids kicking dust till the streetlights came on Older boys from the block rolled up, said "y'all wanna put in work?" We thought it was a game when they told us swing first Punching each other laughing, blood on our shirts, still grinning like it was play [Hook] Still see the porch lights flickering blue from that old TV glow Still hear the alleyways calling my name We thought it was a game We thought it was a game Still see the porch lights flickering blue from that old TV glow [Verse 2] Cops kicked the door one morning, brother and his friend in cuffs Asked me if he changed clothes, I said I don't know He leaned in close, said "tell the truth or you going too" Cops asked questions like truth was optional Same year on the basketball court after school Kid talked too loud about his big brother in the life Older head heard it, made him repeat it, then slapped him twice Learned real quick--keep your mouth closed, keep your eyes down Sleepover at my relative's, I slipped once, mentioned the set Whole room got quiet, later found out my brother switched sides Rivals to them, almost lit a fuse I didn't see From then on I stayed quiet, even at the job later Manager shut my co-worker down fast: too many families got bodies on both sides, just work [Hook] Still see the porch lights flickering blue from that old TV glow Still hear the alleyways calling my name We thought it was a game We thought it was a game Still see the porch lights flickering blue from that old TV glow [Verse 3] Beatings at home got louder every year Mom stepped in front every time, took the worst so we wouldn't Then she started disappearing, casino lights and borrowed cash Relatives banging on the door looking for what she owed Rainy night, blue jacket soaked, walking through the complex Older boys spotted me, sweated me hard against the wall Gave me one warning, let me slide Same day watched my neighbor get stomped outside the corner store Garage break-in later, we came out strapped, words got heavy Neighbor's cousin stepped in, said something low, everything stopped Dad got locked up, lost us, mom moved us into the two-house thing Her with the uncle, us in the other spot, food drops once a month She'd show up bruised… I ain't even feel bad back then Older brother already gone--juvie loop, then 18, gun plea turned 25 He wasn't there for none of that [Bridge] Turned 18, dropped out, nothing but silence in my head Uncle showed up one night putting hands on her again Something in me finally snapped Stepped out and told him straight--if you ever touch her again, we done talking Beatings stopped cold after that [Verse 4] Years roll, took Dad in when he had nowhere left Forgave him slow, watched him keep to himself Then the stroke hit, hospital room, machines beeping We pulled the plug when the doctor said it was done Clan still showed for the funeral even though he walked away from them Paid half, did the rituals right After, my aunt sat me down over dinner Said men like him don't show love easy But she remembered him smiling, one of us on his shoulders back in the day He brought us here so we could have a better shot He failed as a father But he never failed as a man [Outro] Years later my brother called from inside Said he been studying, learning new shit every day Said you can do anything if you stay on it, put the work in Wished he'd known that when he was young Maybe his life would've turned out different I hear him clear now… Still see the porch lights flickering blue from that old TV glow Yeah… we thought it was a game But we made it through
