[Intro – Soft Piano, Male Vocal] Every time I get up and walk away, There's so much more I wish I could say. You think it's just my vape and a little fresh air, But you don't know the war I'm fighting in there. [Verse 1 – Raw Rap] Every time I leave, it's not just for a few pulls, It's my head going crazy, my thoughts getting full. I'm sitting beside you, trying to keep it inside, Got a storm in my chest that I can't seem to hide. And even when I'm distant, when you're not around, These feelings keep rising, they don't settle down. I'm trying to control it, I'm trying to be strong, But this battle in my head has been going on too long. I look at you and all I wanna do is kiss you, Pull you close, hold you tight, tell you how much I miss you. But I know that you have limits, and I have to respect them, Your comfort comes first, I will never forget it. So I swallow my feelings, put a smile on my face, Try to give you your freedom, try to give you your space. But pretending I'm okay when I'm breaking within Is a fight every day that I don't always win. [Chorus – Emotional Pop-Rap] It's a war inside my head, twenty-four seven, Trying to find some peace, but I can't find the exit. I'm losing my mind, yeah, it's driving me insane, Trying to hold it together while I'm drowning in the pain. So I grab my vape and I walk down the street, Put my music in my ears, let the rhythm guide my feet. But it never goes away, it just quiets for a while, And I hate being away when I just want to see you smile. [Verse 2 – Faster Rap] It's not about the vape, it's the silence that I need, Trying to slow down my thoughts, trying to get them off me. Every step that I take is a fight for control, While these feelings keep burning somewhere deep in my soul. I don't want to pressure you, don't want you feeling trapped, Don't want my need for affection to become another crack. I know you don't always want the things that I do, And loving you means respecting what's comfortable for you. But damn, it's hard sometimes, and I'm telling the truth, There's a war in my mind that I'm struggling to get through. I want your arms around me, want your lips against mine, But I won't demand your affection just to make myself feel fine. I'll wait until you're ready, I'll respect your pace, I won't force a single moment, I won't take your space. But I wish you could understand what I'm fighting alone, How I miss you even when we're sitting in the same home. [Chorus – Stronger Male Vocal] It's a war inside my head, twenty-four seven, Trying to find some peace, but I can't find the exit. I'm losing my mind, yeah, it's driving me insane, Trying to hold it together while I'm drowning in the pain. So I grab my vape and I walk down the street, Put my music in my ears, let the rhythm guide my feet. But it never goes away, it just quiets for a while, And I hate being away when I just want to see you smile. [Bridge – Soft, Honest Vocal] And I hate these walks, I hate leaving your side, When all I want is to stay here with nothing to hide. But sometimes I need distance to quiet the noise, To find a little peace when my mind destroys my poise. I'm not walking away from you, I'm fighting what's within, Trying not to let the chaos decide how I live. I wish I could switch it off, wish I could make it stop, But sometimes all I can do is walk until my thoughts drop. [Final Verse – Raw Rap] So next time I stand up and head out that door, Know there's a reason, there's a whole lot more. It's not just a few pulls, not just music in my ears, It's me trying to find calm in a storm that never clears. I want to be beside you, that's where I want to stay, Not walking down the road trying to make the thoughts go away. I'm trying to find a balance, trying to do what's right, Trying to make it through the day and get some peace at night. I love you enough to respect what you need, Even when my own heart is begging me to feel that closeness with you. I don't expect you to fix me or carry this fight, I just wish you could understand what happens inside. [Outro – Soft Piano] So when I take that walk, know I'm not leaving you behind, I'm just trying to find some quiet in a restless mind. And even when I'm walking, with my music playing low, The place I want to be is beside you, you should know. It's not just my vape. It's the war inside my head. And I wish I could find peace right here beside you instead.
