Brando dats me ( I'm truly sorry.) Its hard to love me, when i dont love myself It's hard to love me, Its hard to love me, I get distant Push you away when you get close I feel different , Dont mean to hurt u That was never my intention But I've been hurt so much My heart need intervention Its hard to love me, I admit it You say you here for me But baby I don't get it Trying to fix me But im broken past the limits I need peace not someone in my business Too much going on inside my head Voices talking, tears on the bed Trying to smile but im feeling dead Say im good but i lie instead Aint no peace just war in my mind Love gone cold, Heart stuck in time Lost my soul cant find my thread All these demons living in my head I aint perfect never claimed to be If i give you all my pain Would u stay with me If i told you all my flaws, Would you pray for me, Or would you switch like the rest And just play with me. I got trust issues heavy its a burden Act cold but deep down im still hurting I don't text back Because my mind be at war Trying to love me but you dont know Whats in store Baby I'm trying to learn to heal But some nights I don't even wanna feel If i push you away just know its real Its hard to love me, I get distant Push you away when you get close I feel different , Dont mean to hurt you That was never my intention But I've been hurt so much My heart need intervention I got some habits I don't speak on Voices in my head They dont leave now You deserve more then a maybe I dont wanna love if its gonna break me Ive been lied too used and betrayed Every, I love you feel fake these days Use to feel save when i heard your voice Now silence hit like i aint got no choice Got pain i cant post online So i bleed it all out on in a rhyme Friends turn fake i aint surprised Loyal was rare had to cut some ties Trying to fix me but im torn inside Put my heart in the beat and i vibe Too much going on inside my head Voices talking, tears on the bed Trying to smile but im feeling dead Say im good but i lie instead Aint no peace just war in my mind Love gone cold, Heart stuck in time Lost my soul cant find my thread All these demons living in my head Every night i replay my own regrets Things i said and the things i left Used to pray for the light to see Now im just praying pain set me free Ive been lost trying to find my way Smiling in pics but im not okay Dont text me Stay strong, I'm tired I dont wanna vent no more Still i write when my heart feel is sore I done walked in the rain alone But its worse when the hurt hits home I’m a ticking time bomb, waitin' for the spark to hit Every time you say you love me, I just think you’re full of shit 'Cause how can you find beauty in this goddamn hollow shell? I’m dragging you through heaven just to drop you off in hell I’m addicted to the chaos, yeah, I’m hooked on all the trauma I’d rather be alone than deal with all the extra drama I’m a masochist for misery, I’m bleeding on the floor I wonder why every single promise that we ever made just fade away My head is like a prison, and the guards are all insane Pouring salt inside the gashes just to keep me in the pain I’m screaming at the mirror, "Why the fuck you still alive?" It’s a miracle a monster like me managed to survive I’m paranoid as hell, thinkin' everyone’s a snake So don't tell me that you're different, don't tell me that you'll stay 'Cause I'll find a fucking way to make you turn and walk away I'm a ghost inside a body, I'm a shadow in the hall I'll let you get real close just to watch you take the fall My heart is like a cemetery, graves are all I own I'm the king of this disaster on a cold and broken throne If you love me, then you’re crazy; if you leave me, then you’re smart Either way, I’m gonna end up ripping us both apart. They see Big Bando, yeah, they see the gold and the grit But they don’t see the nights I’m contemplating how to quit Heavy is the head that wears the crown in the trenches Dealing with these demons and these cold-hearted lynches I’m a street legend, but a ghost in my own home Built a kingdom out of trauma just to sit here all alone Bando ain't a name, it’s a place where the light dies You can see the graveyard reflecting in my eyes I’m the one they call on when the block starts to bleed But who the fuck is coming when it’s Bando in need (They jus watch my soul bleed) Now it’s Lonely Bando, staring at the cracks in the wall Waiting on a "How you doing?" but I never get a call Just "Can I get a favor?" or ("Hold ya head up,just shut the fuck up!) Man, I’m surrounded by vultures, yet I’m out here on my own I put my soul in this shit, I let the ink turn to blood Trying to keep my head up while they drag me through the mud It’s a lonely road to greatness when you’re haunted by the past I’m pouring out my liquor, hoping that the peace'll last From the gutter to the throne, yeah, I’ve seen it all, it’s true But being(Ba-Ba- Bando)means nobody really knows u.
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