Lyrics: [Intro, Amp feedback, Detuned guitar, Uneven breathing] I'm not your boyfriend anymore Fuck I hate how that sounds [Verse 1, Fenix, Rough close-mic vocal] Yesterday I had somebody to call mine Now I'm staring at the ceiling wasting all my time Fifth fucking heartbreak, tell me what does that make me? Every goodbye digs up the shit that already breaks me I keep thinking about the first girl I ever had The first time love was something real instead of something sad Ever since I lost her, every ending feels the same Like the past kicks down the door and starts screaming my name [Pre-Chorus, Dissonant guitar building] Here it comes again That old familiar ghost The second somebody leaves I remember who I lost the most [Chorus, Huge downtuned guitars, Shouted vocal] I'm not your boyfriend anymore I'm depressed as fuck on the bedroom floor Five broken hearts and I'm keeping score How many times can I take one more? I'm not your boyfriend anymore And that old curse is knocking at my door Love shows up, then it disappears And every goodbye brings back seven years [Post-Chorus, Gang shouts, Feedback] Not anymore Not anymore Five times broken What the fuck am I fighting for? [Verse 2, Dirty bass, Palm-muted guitar] I don't even know what I'm supposed to do When everything I planned had a place for you Now my phone stays quiet and the nights drag on And I keep waking up remembering you're gone I tell myself I'm cursed when it comes to love Like happiness gets close then decides I've had enough But maybe that's the grief underneath my skin Turning every new goodbye into the first loss again [Pre-Chorus, Fenix, Cracked vocal] Here it comes again That old familiar pain Different person leaving Same storm inside my brain [Chorus, Explosive guitars, Double vocal] I'm not your boyfriend anymore I'm depressed as fuck on the bedroom floor Five broken hearts and I'm keeping score How many times can I take one more? I'm not your boyfriend anymore And that old curse is knocking at my door Love shows up, then it disappears And every goodbye brings back seven years [Breakdown, Crushing guitars, Half-time drums] Five Fucking Times Five different endings in my mind First love First loss Still paying some imaginary cost I'm sick of blaming myself For every person who leaves I'm sick of thinking being alone Is all I'm ever gonna be [Bridge, Guitar drops out, Bare piano and room noise] I miss who I was before loss taught me fear Before every goodbye made the past reappear I don't know what comes next I don't know what to say I just know this fucking pain is loud today So I'll say that I'm hurting instead of hiding away I'll let somebody hear me when I don't feel okay Maybe being brokenhearted doesn't mean I'm cursed Maybe five bad endings don't decide what comes first [Build, Distorted bass, Drums rising] Not your boyfriend Not anymore Still fucking hurting Still here though Not your boyfriend Not anymore But this isn't the end Just another slammed door [Final Chorus, Massive guitars, Fenix, Raw screamed-sung vocal] I'm not your boyfriend anymore I'm depressed as fuck and my heart is sore Five broken hearts but I'm still keeping on Even when every damn answer feels gone I'm not your boyfriend anymore And that old grief still scratches at my door But love leaving doesn't mean I'm cursed Tonight fucking hurts But it won't write every verse [Final Breakdown, Gang vocals] Five times broken Still here Five times broken Still here The past came back Still here My heart got cracked Still here [Outro, Detuned clean guitar, Fenix, Exhausted natural vocal] I'm not your boyfriend anymore I still hate how that sounds I don't know what happens next But tonight I'm not carrying all of this by myself [Feedback fades] [End]
