Be become
wanting to fit in but longing to stand out, opt out. Beneath the, above the, status quo. happiness in darkness and darkness in the morning for the darkness is always in me. -it hovers like a cloud- above my head- steady constant rain- inside me - like the saddest little marshland inside my brain. I’m sad I’m burning flame. I’m over all these stupid, little, lifeless life games. who’s to say it’s me, it’s not me I’m the freak, not free, and I’m here unless I go give up? I’m free, except for these bars and chains containing me, I’m I’m breathing out the apathy finding only destruction and greed and I’m green, sick, from all the dismay, dishonesty if I could burn holes, bore holes through you with just my anger and dirty looks, I would be a serial killing little dweeb; but offers don’t come like- that they leave us to the elements and fretting far past [when] comfort says to stay. I don’t know, I know I know I don’t know! I’m lost in the anger in the grove of all these hell demon plants blubbering excuses, grant grant me the awareness to be to believe In anything, anything, even me except me except the free. the freaks, the treats, I’m here, but I’m not, I’m not here- I’m with me, lost in the prophecy. reading on how: I’m complete, incomplete, I’m completely obsolete! just another human ground to meat. and look at me these tears breed inept and disagrees.. just want some plesentness, but finding only pain. I’ve searched the streets only finding pain and loss, is this all awaits me? you’ve taken damn near everything, and look at us, look at we: we’ve got to find a way to speak!! -I miss the me I used to be! and so alone, save for the mean, the deranged and torturing- burning their hate -right into me. and not deserved and not unclean. it’s a sheer cut of the obsessed, obscene, I’m wondering: is there any more, any left for me? I’ve got to be and hooked on a role on a stole stolen life at my feet, it lay gasping, grasping, for any worthwhile leak, stray thoughts bore horrors into me. 😵💫😳😬 I miss the free. 🦅🙊🕊️ seldom angry, but know it all I’ve beeen all I can be it seems to be a lonesome another lonesome night packed full of apathy, I’m furthering my knowledge! and getting out! nowhere to be, laughter ain’t the way, but see.. if I could, I would tear it up! right on through the harrowing, mindless… trees! 🌳🌲🌴🫡🌵 I’m lost, I see. see? I see you, seeing me. hard to miss!! it’s everywhere, and all I DON’T want to see, have, or hear, or.. scream. I’d scream! I scream internally! la da dah la de day finally got reeeall, finally got to say, “I hate this pain, dismay, this array.” 🤜🫷 “you aren’t my friends, you FEED on me.” “I’m not an object or a program.” I need to breathe let me be be BE!! ✊
