I didn’t know… But now I do. Faith was wrapped in silence— and I, too blind to see the truth. I never learned your sacred ways, the weight your silence bore… I walked through fire without a name, and now I ache forevermore. I bow my head in ashes— no excuse for all I missed. I meant to bring you peace, but I only brought the risk. Held an olive branch in fire, thought love alone would save… But I see now it was your life that I asked you to betray. You left without a goodbye— now I know the reason why. You were tired… too tired to fight what I refused to recognize. I still pray in quiet moments, still hold that one-way flame. If you turned around tomorrow, I'd still give you the same. I am haram— a forbidden name. Would you leave your world to carry my shame? Would you walk from your motherland, burn your prayer, and take my hand? No wonder you were torn apart— to the bitter marrow, to the heart. I never knew why you held back, ’til I opened the book and read it back. It wasn’t shame— it was sorrow’s flood, and I now know what you understood. I am haram… the path denied. I could not bend, I could not hide. A man born from a warring text, too proud to fold, too lost to bless. You held your silence while I burned. Now I see… what I never learned. I made my peace with heaven— but I still ache for you. If you asked for an escape, I’d carry us both through. But not if it meant you’d lose your light… Not if love would cost your right. That is not love— not grace, not true. To mold your soul to fit my view. I see the wound, and it wears my face. I was the cage in love’s embrace. So go where your spirit sings— not clipped by my unholy wings. I am haram… and still I pray… not for your return— but peace your way. Now I know… and still I bleed. But I let you go… so you are free. I still give you an out— a one-way dream. No doubt remains, I’d love unseen. But would you love me back the same? Anhedonia… the final chain.
