Exterminatus!

I was just a lowly scribe in the Astra files Filing reports ‘bout Tyranids and plaguey trials Then one day, Inquisitor Steve Sneezed on a button — I couldn’t believe! “Ex-ter-mi-naaa-tus…” Don’t push that button, don’t start that purge Unless you want the whole dang moon to splurge With virus bombs, and melta showers, Goodbye brunch plans, we’re gone in hours! Don’t push that button, I beg you please — That ain’t a snack tray, it’s the end of species! Steve said, “Oops,” with a casual glance, Wiped his fingers on a Servo-Servant's pants He said, “We had Chaos cultists, right?” I said, “No, Steve... that was karaoke night.” He thought they were summoning daemons of doom But they were just belting ballads in the rec room! Don’t push that button, don’t smash that screen It’s not your Spotify, it’s a death machine! Orbital strikes ain’t playin’ nice, They’ll torch your crops and your neighbor’s rice! Don’t push that button — you absolute loon! We just vaped a planet ‘cause you skipped the briefing at noon! “Captain, we've lost communication with... well... existence.” “What happened?” “Inquisitor Steve tried to microwave his fish sticks again.” Now I’m drifting through space with the survivors few Steve’s in the brig, and he still has no clue He thinks ‘Exterminatus’ means ‘extra lunch’ But it’s the reason this verse is my last munch Don’t push that button, Steve, we swear The last time you did, we nuked the air A whole biosphere gone to blazes, Now we’re banned from twenty stellar phases! Don’t push that button, or even squint — It ain't a gumdrop, Steve, it's the Emperor's flamin' flint! "Exterrrr...minaaaa...tusssss..." “Please confirm planet deletion. Yes/No?”